Monday, February 11, 2008

I don't do well on movie dates

Yes, I always seem to have really bad luck with them. Some of you might have read about the movie date I blogged about quite a long time back, where the girl screamed at me "We are not a couple" when I tried to gently (but repeatedly) persuade her to get the couple seats. Well in the past week I had two more misadventures, both on movie dates. And a few years ago I fell asleep and snored during Capote.

First was last Saturday, I went to catch Michael Clayton with a girl friend and we had Japanese food for dinner. We were chatting and I was entertaining her with the story of the fighter/mage character that I was using in Baldur's Gate 2 and how I was trying my best to get Viconia the drow priestess to sleep with me (which isn't as easy as it sounds). As I was speaking I noticed that her eyes kept going towards my right cheek but I thought nothing of it, besides I do have rather rosy cheeks that some women find really sexy.

So there I was, 5 minutes into my monologue, when she suddenly interrupted my very engaging monologue and told me that was some Japanese sticky rice on my right cheek. I quickly used my fingers to brush against my cheek and came away with a huge lump almost the size of my palm. How it got there was a mystery that I still cannot figure out, it was a fair distance from my oral orifice. Suffice to say, it was quite embarrassing for me and that kinda set the tone for the rest of the date, which I shall not delve into any further.

Second disastrous date was with another girl friend, we went to watch the Diving Bell and the Butterfly. K first I didn't know much about the movie except that it got rave reviews on, so when the movie started I turned to her and asked "Wait, is this a French movie?". Her look of disgust still haunts me now weeks after, she was probably shocked at my ignorance, but seriously how was I supposed to know (k on hindsight the names of the actors were big clues)? The movie turned out to be really amazing, probably the best movie I seen this year, and I found myself tearing as the credits roll. So you can imagine my shock when my girl friend started guffawing loudly!

I looked at her in horror, unable to comprehend how anyone could laugh at such an emotionally draining movie. Seriously, the way she was laughing you would think that we had just seen the comedy of the year. Of course, the other movie goers were also shocked at her reaction, that was how loud she was. Wiping my tears, I asked her why she was laughing. Her reply was that she was laughing at me, she couldn't imagine a guy like me bawling in a cinema.

See that's the problem with women! They whine about how men aren't able to open up emotionally, but when they do they get laughed at for being pussies! Like seriously WTF! I got totally pissed at her comment and so I retorted that I thought she was a cold heartless bitch and then I just stormed out of the cinema crying. People just outside the cinema started staring at me so I forced my tear ducts shut and promised myself that I would not bawl in public. I managed to rein it in till I got into a cab, but as soon as the cab driver asked me where I wanted to go I lost it and started sobbing. Bloody cab driver didn't even try to console me, asshole. And yes, I know cabs are considered public transport.

So yes I decided that there will be no more movie dates for me ever again.


  1. I did not scream , I just gently reminded you that we're not a couple in an unusually higher pitch of voice.

  2. Awww Gilby baby. Should've waited and gone with me. I'd cry with you! *hugs*

  3. Are they showing the Hannah Montana 3-D movie there? You couldn't go wrong with that one - it's more like going to a concert...without all the elbows and smelly people.

  4. I've my fair share of bad dates too ... urrgh. Hang in there

    Sometimes I ask myself why am I putting myself through this .. well procreation and parenthood comes to mind, but honestly I just want to get 'laid' :p

  5. Tank - Errm who?

    Eternal - My mistake.

    Minah - The power of hindsight.

    Anonymous - Well you score points for honesty.