Friday, July 20, 2007

New Annoying trend + IT Chicks are hot.

You know what is really annoying? When you call someone and instead of hearing the standard ringtone, you hear a song. I called up a partner in India yesterday, and the next thing I know this Hindi song starts blasting in my ear.

Why the hell do people try to force others to listen to their songs? Why don't they get that just because you like a certain song that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone else has to like it too?  Why do mobile providers give that kind of power to idiots for them to annoy others?

K enough of bitcing. Been so freaking busy this past 2 weeks with a joint-project with 2 other software companies. Gonna load up on the drinks later, I need to release two weeks of work stress and pented-up sexual frustration.

Oh speaking of the project, one of the people involved from the other company is a chick. I totally didn't realise she was a girl till we met, till then we had only exchanged emails. That's in complete contrast to most of my experiences that the "girls" meet online turn out to be guys. ("F**K YOU Pamela! Pamela my ass!) Life is full of irony sometimes. But let me get back to the story.

So we met to discuss our collaboration. I sat opposite her, across the table, and she starts talking. In technical jargon. Using words like "API" , "provisioning" and "AD". (AD is Active Directory). It was love at first sight. I had to stop myself from standing up and coming across the table (pun intended), I was that turned on.

I stared at her lustily as she kept speaking, her words sounding like a stream of binaries (1s and 0s) to my ears. Eventually she stopped, and I sighed at the sudden withdrawal of that sweet voice. I realised then that she was staring at me, probably because I sighed really loudly and possibly also because I was leaning my upper body way forward towards her,  so I turned away shyly and started stammering about how I agreed with what she said.

I haven't seen her since, although we have exchanged a couple of phone calls regarding work. I am starting to miss her already. I miss you my little IT chicklet. 

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Things you never say to a taxi driver

I woke up late last Monday, thanks to an all night porn marathon. You know you are getting old when porn tires you out that you can't even get up the next morning.  Anyway, I quickly changed and rushed out of the house, and was just fortunate enough to catch the 8 am bus. However when I got off at the train station, I realized that I had left my wallet at my place.

I decided to take a cab back to my place and to get my mom to bring my wallet down to pass to me, after which I would just continue on to my workplace. I manage to hail a cab after a fairly short way, told him that I was going to my place to pick up something from someone and then to proceed to the city. I then called my mom to tell her to come down immediately.

When we reached my flat, I told the cab driver to wait for a bit since my mom wasn't down yet. For some reason he started getting all bitchy and telling me I should have called my friend down earlier and kept grumbling and being a complete ass. I got pissed, so I told him I didn't need to take this shit and I am just gonna take another one. He agreed.

I reached into my back pocket for my wallet to pay the fare...and then remembered that I didn't have it with me. I turned back to the cab driver who was looking at me angrily. I didn't know exactly how to explain to him that I couldn't pay him after saying I would take another cab, so I stared at him dumbly, hoping to stall for time till mom arrives..

Cabbie: Waiting for what?
Me: "I waiting for my mommy can!!! "
Cabbie: (With a look of utter disgust) What?? Aiyah Just get out of the cab, don't need to pay lah!

 I got out of the cab with my tail between my legs. Just as he sped away, mommy appeared with my wallet. Sigh, if only she had come a few seconds earlier, I would have really shown him who I was. Lucky asshole.

Monday, July 09, 2007

More Sex is Safer than Less Sex: Economist's Point of view

A four page essay from an economist's point of view as to why EVERYONE should be having more sex in order to slow the spread of AIDS.

Excerpt:

"A cautious guy like Martin does the world a favor every time he hits the bars. In fact, he does the world two favors. First he improves the odds for everyone who's out there seeking a safe match. The second favor is more macabre, but probably also more significant: If Martin picks up a new partner tonight, he just might pick up an infection as well. That's great. Because then Martin goes home, wastes away in solitude, and eventually dies - taking the virus with him."

Link: More Sex is Safer

Sex Tips (with video demonstration by 2 chicks)

I am posting this purely for its educational value. If only they had sex ed lessons like this when I was in school. (NSFW but no nudity)

Link: Sex Tips Lesson 9: Sex Positions

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Tension in the air

I been spending a lot of time with S recently. Let's see we met today after work. Last Sunday as well. Saturday night. Two or three times the week before.

And during all our recent outings I realized that there was something strange and different happening between us; a certain kind of unspoken tension now hung in the air whenever we met up. The tension that was, dare I say it, very sexual in nature. I thought long and hard about it and decided to bring up the subject today. We had a really nice dinner at Phin's Steakhouse, and then took a romantic walk around Tampines Central.

Me: So I will be seeing you tomorrow after work then for the movie?
S : Yes...I guess ...we will.

Did I detect a hint of shyness in her voice? Yes I am sure I did. A shyness that was never there before. My suspicions about us seem to be correct.

Me: We been seeing a lot of each other recently haven't we?
S : Uhhmmmm yeah we have.
Me: Yeah, a LOT. Hell the next thing you know, we might like just hook up? *giggle*

They don't call me Romeo for nothing. But yes, very subtly the bait was thrown. All she needed to do was bite on it and we could finally address this little 'thing' that was going on between us.

S: *laughs uncontrollably*
Me: Wait, what's so funny?
S: Oh nothing at all. *still laughing*
Me: (Exasperated) You know it could happen! When two people hang out together as often as we do, things happen!
S: Yes Bert, I am sure it could.

You could cut the ridicule in her words with a knife. So apparently my suspicions were slightly off the mark. Humilation is a sucky feeling. Angered by her insensitive treatment of my feelings, I hit back.

Me: Well laugh all you want sista. But I doubt there will be laughter when you come to me in a few weeks and say "Bert, I think I'm starting to have feelings for you." Cos when you do that, my reply is gonna make you CRY!!

S: Oh my god you are right, forgive me Stallion, please I beg you. Please, I can't imagine that happening, it would break my heart.

If she didn't use my nickname I would actually have thought she was seriously repentant. The rest of the evening was ...well the less said the better. Somehow I have a feeling we won't be spending as much time together anymore.