Continuing what I would like to call my 'whiny' phase, I would like to share this pretty upsetting incident that happened to me last week.
I was trying out this pair of jeans that I bought 6 months ago but I had trouble getting into it.
Me: Mom!! We need to replace the washing machine! It keeps shrinking my clothes!!
Me: What was that?
Mom: Oh nothing, sure we can buy one soon. Again. As long as you are paying for it.
Me: Mom, if you have something to say , just say it.
Mom: I would say it but I am not sure if that's what you want.
Me: (Shouting) All I want is the truth!!!
Mom: (Shouting back) You want the truth?? You can't handle the truth!!
Me: Just tell me !!!
Mom: Fine. The washing machine did not shrink your clothes. Neither does drying your clothes out in the sun. And while we are being honest, the shopgirls at clothing stores aren't trying to rip you off by changing the size labels on their clothes. You want the truth!? The truth is you are fat now. You are no longer that slim sexy hottie you were when you were 21! Deal with it and stop blaming everything else for your wardrobe woes!
And with that she left. I stood there in shock. They say it's those who are closest to you who have the power to hurt you the most. They were right.
Her words kept playing through my head as I lay on my bed that night. I kept trying to convince myself she didn't mean it. I never expected her to say something so cruel to me, I mean this was the same women who used to lovingly refer to me as mommy's little laddu. Maybe I didn't know her as well as I thought I did.
I didn't sleep a wink that night, but the next morning I woke up knowing what I needed to do. I went jogging around my block (hey I haven't been jogging in a long while alright). It felt good. The next day I bought a pair of roller blades and went blading at East Coast.
Mom was right, I had been a bit delusional about the fact that I needed to lose some weight. I realize now that she said what she said because she cared about me, and also because some of the women she was trying to find for me weren't too crazy about big guys.
Mom just told me that she's gonna try and hook me up with another Indian girl yesterday. She told me that this girl will be more modern than the last one, apparently she wore jeans. I'm pretty excited about it!