Sunday, June 26, 2005

Intro to Fine Dining

Having lead a fairly affluent lifestyle for a while, the Stallion is used to the pleasures of fine dining. However, I rarely meet people who share my passion for it, so I decided (in the name of charity) to invite Nethia to have dinner at this rather lovely restaurant at Marina Square called Six and Sevens. The poor gal, her idea of fine dining is probably having dinner at Kenny Rogers so I decided to introduce her to a more socially superior way of dining. However as the evening progressed, I started to regret my decision to invite her.

First was the wine. I asked the waiter for the finest wine they had below 30 dollars and they brought out a wine bottle that looked more like grape juice than alcohol. The waiter poured a little of the wine to let me taste it, which I did and I then told him it was fine.

But then Nethia was like "Aren't you supposed to swirl and sniff the wine first?". I laughed at her naivete before I explained to her that people like me who practically fine dine everyday don't need to do the swirling and sniffing bits because we can tell the quality of the wine just by sipping it. She didn't seem utterly convinced though.

Next she complained that the soup was too watery. Again I had to explain to her that this wasn't Campbell soup, this was high quality soup that was probably flown in from France so the altitude probably caused the watery texture. But yes I was getting a bit annoyed to be honest at her lack of fine dining knowledge.

The main course was next. What happened then was really a low point in my long history of fine dining experiences. Nethia spat out a carrot piece halfway out the table while I was trying to engage her in intellectual conversation about the wart I found near my right arm. I was shocked at her appalling behavior but being a gentleman I pretended not to notice the big orange half chewed glob in the middle of the table. However, Nethia was incredibly embarrassed (as she should be) and appeared really tensed from that moment onwards.

Finally out of pity at her plight I did the most gentlemanly thing ever done in the history of fine dining. I reached out and "accidentally" knocked over my own glass of wine. Yes in order to relieve her embarrassment I magnanimously caused my own. However instead of ignoring the spilled wine she started laughing. Rude uncouth gal. She even rejected my explanation, insisting that I did not do it on purpose. How ungrateful can anyone get?

The rest of the dinner was spent with me trying to block out the sound of her continuous laughter and insults pertaining to my clumsiness. It turned out to be a night I would never forget.


p.s. Usually I would wait for her to post her version of the story before I post my own, but she's currently in Indonesia on a school trip for a whole month.

9 comments:

  1. Oh dear, you sound so gentlemanly, one of the last few existing stallionish gems!

    *grin

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  2. Fuck you la, exploiting the situation just becos i'm not in singapore right...i assure you people, his version is warped...wait for mine...hopefully it will be up in 3 weeks...cos thats when i get my ass back to spore

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  3. Oh my word! You two are a riot!!

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  4. dude...
    when you go for slipknot...
    try n distinguish yourself...
    wear pink...
    im thinkin of wearing..mauve..

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  5. Kenny Rogers? Do you mean Roy Rogers?? That's ridiculous.

    My idea of fine dining is Pizza Hut.

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  6. oh bert...why'd u blog about this when nehtia's away...thats just not cool.

    hey dawn..pizza hut can be fine dining...as long as u eat your pizze with a fork and knife (thats what i do)
    you feel strangely BETTER than the others..all those finger licking lower class buffoooons.

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  7. You must really hate her - or she's a real slob... If I were her I'd sue your sorry ass off!

    Not funny

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  8. Twit: Yes finally someone who appreciates me, I think I shall bring you there next time.

    Nethia: Sigh why don't you just admit the fact that you are not cut out for fine dining!

    Jaywalk :Err thanks?

    Arzish: Pink. Right. Actually i was gonna wear a black baby tee. So you going also ah .

    Dawn : NO I mean Kenny Rogers. They dun have it there? It's started by their country singer guy. Oh, pizza hut eh. Err thats nice *rolls eyes*.

    Mahima : Pple who eat pizzas with utensils are lame!! You will never know the joy of feeling the melted cheese dripping down your fingers and chest and all the way to your groin.

    Not funny: Hate is such a strong word.

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  9. Hehe..cute post..
    Try Porta Porta(changi/tanjong pagar)..best Italian food I've ever had- at least after Prego was bastardized.

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