Saturday, December 31, 2005

Year in Review: My Top 5 Tech Finds

Yes I am gonna forgo my usual ultra-cool metrosexual side and go a little geeky for this post. The following are the top 5 finds of last year that really made a difference in the way I use the web.

1. Music: Last.fm/Pandora

In the past the only way I got to discover new music/bands was going through music websites, finding highly recommended artists and then downloading mp3s of their songs, after which I would buy the CD if I liked it.

Those days are long gone with the emergence of music sites like Last.fm and Pandora. Last.fm is not just an online radio station, it tracks the songs that you play on your computer, and plays you other artists that you might like based on your musical tastes. It does this by comparing you to other users who like the same bands. I have lost count of the number of amazing bands that I have discovered through this amazing website. In fact it's so good I became a paid subscriber.

Pandora works in a similar way, but it's more "scientific" as it identifies key components in the song (tempo, vocal style etc.) to find similar artists for you. However it runs off the website so all you need is a flash-enabled browser.

Links:
Last.fm
Pandora

2. Bookmarks: del.icio.us

The problem with traditional bookmarks is they are practically impossible to manage once you have a sizeable number. The reason for this is even if you sort them into folders after some time you forget which folders they are under.

Del.icio.us solves that problem by using tags to sort your bookmarks. del.icio.us tags are simply ANY words YOU associate with a website. For example, for my site you might use the tags "blog", "lamea" and "daily" . Then when you search for a particular bookmark, just search for any of the words and you should see it. Might sound confusing at first, but you will get it after you use it for while.

Link:
Del.icio.us

3. Tech News: Digg

Digg is a very cool tech news website but with the unique feature that readers submit the stories. However, it allows users to rate ("digg) stories that they think is good , only the highest rated ones are shown on the main page.

Link :
digg

4. RSS Portal: Netvibes

In the old days you had to keep going to a site to check if it has been updated. But with RSS , you get updates sent to you. Google and Microsoft have web portals that allow you to read rss feeds, but the best in my opinion is Netvibes as it manages the feeds very elegantly. You can even check your gmail, yahoo or any pop or imap based email from the page. Click the screenshot below to see my portal.



Link:
Netvibes

5. Games: Scorched3D/Pawn

My two favorite free games I discovered in 2005. Pawn is a free chess game that is really exceptional considering its price, a good way to pass the time when you are bored. Scorched 3D is a 3D game that is like worms but you control a tank and try to take out other tanks.

Links:
Scorched 3D
Pawn

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

My Christmas Weekend

So I had a relatively low-key Christmas this year, except for the fact that my uncle tried to matchmake me with some girl who is a daughter of a friend, but he doesn't really know her. Do I look so desperate that he feels the need to hook me up with someone he doesn't even know that well?

Oh went to catch King Kong on Friday. Almost fell asleep during the first half hour, the setup was kinda draggy for a blockbuster action movie. But it quickly picked up after that and all in all I would say it was a really good movie. The fight between Kong and the dinosaurs is pretty adrenaline-inducing, but the best part was the end - it was really sad, it almost brought me to tears. Fine fine I was tearing a bit alright, but that's only because I have a soft spot for giant gorillas.

Finally, I got this really hurtful comment from an anonymous reader for my facial post:

"...Maybe you should save up and go for a plastic surgery instead. Meantime buy some mirrors to remind yourself how ugly you look...so you'll stop misleading people by telling them how cool or macho you are"

Thanks to that comment I cried for the second time in 4 days. How can people can be so cruel to post such a mean comment considering it's Christmas and all? At first I thought it was my mom, after all she has suggested to me in the past that I should go and "get some work done", but then I realized it couldn't be her because she would have the balls (figuratively speaking of course) to leave her name.

Finally I realized who it was. Yes Chris, I know it's you.

Who is Chris I hear you ask? Chris was this really good buddy of mine in the past, we were really close. Till one night when we both got completely wasted. The next thing I know he suddenly seemed really sexy in that tight singlet of his and a second later my hand somehow found its way to his crotch. One thing lead to another ..... well I will leave the rest of the details to your imagination.

The next morning I told him it was a mistake, that it was the alcohol and his tight singlet that caused it to happen, and we should try and forget about it and move on. But he didn't wanna accept it, he said we could make it work. I told him that it couldn't because I was straight most of the time, and that's when he completely lost it and went all psycho on me, talking about the power of man love and how it can conquer all and weird things like that. I left quickly before he got dressed and avoided him after that.

Anyway the asshole has been stalking me ever since, and now he has found my blog. Seriously Chris, give it up. You ain't getting any of my booty (anymore). I repeat again, it was a mistake, it was just a two one night thing, move on!

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Zdnet writer is a leecher

This is funny. This ZDnet writer hotlinked to this guy's image of an Xbox for his ZDnet article, and he paid the (very high) price for his stupidity. Click the title of the post to see it. Hope he's married, otherwise he would probably have a hard time finding dates after this.

Long Boring Explanation:

K this is for those who aren't sure what I am talking about. If you see an image on someone's site and you wanna use it on your own site, the proper thing to do is download it and upload to your own server (or a free image hosting server like photobucket) and link it.

The reason for this is if you just link to his image, the image is being pulled from the poor fellow's server everytime someone views your page, and uses up his bandwidth. And most sites have limited bandwidth.

It's still understandable if a non-techie person does it, he/she could feign ignorance. For a computing site writer to do it is another matter altogether.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Rap Music Used To Torture Terror Suspects

Ha this is kinda funny. Apparently songs by Eminem and Dr Dre were forced upon on inmates in a secret US prison "for up to 20 days". Hmm if I was Dr Dre or Eminem I would be kind of insulted that my music was deemed bad enough for the purpose of torture.

But I am guessing the wardens probably thought it would be way TOO cruel to use songs by Backstreet Boys ?

Listening to :
Alien by Strapping Young Lad
This Godless Endeavor by Nevermore

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

The Man with the Facial Mask



Yup that's me at my facial on Monday. I went on the insistence of my sister who booked the appointment for me - she told me that her friends were coming over on Xmas so ANY improvement in my appearance would be a godsend.

When I arrived at the place, there was this ah beng also waiting for his facial. The place was rather small so we were kinda sitting uncomfortably close to each other while we waited, and for some reason I suddenly felt the need to assert the fact that I was not gay. So I grunted. Very macho-ly. Cos' everyone knows that gay guys do not grunt.

The ah beng looked at me, and then he took out his phone and started calling his girlfriend and talking to her very lovingly, that was probably his way of asserting his sexuality.

After 10 agonizing minutes of intense homophobic sexual tension, I was called into the room. I asked the lady if I needed to take off my shirt, and she replied (rather too quickly in my opinion) that I shouldn't. Sigh if I had a dollar every time a girl said that to me.

Anyway the facial itself was really nice, the facialist's hands were pure magic I tell ya, I almost fell asleep at one point. She was pretty friendly as well, we had fun exchanging information about the latest sales in town (e.g. Mango) and the wonderful decorations all around the city streets.

After what seemed like too brief a period it ended. I looked at the clock and it was almost 9, it had lasted almost 2 hours. I left the place with a tinge of regret and sadness, but then I cheered up at the thought that I will be back a month from now. Can't wait.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Tips for backpacking in Vietnam

1. Check the weather forecasts in those cities you are visiting.

This is very important, you do not want to go to a place with a nice beach and end up stuck in the close vicinity of your hotel because it rains the whole freaking day. To make it worse, we had the view of the sea/beach from our hotel room. It's a horrible thing to see something so beautiful everyday but not being able to touch it (the same way I feel about most women I meet)

2. Don't bother bringing too many clothes, toiletries.

T-shirts and shorts are really cheap as hell (around 2 dollars), so don't bother bringing too many of your own clothes and adding more weight to your backpack. Especially heavy clothes like jeans and jackets.

3. Don't change your money in Singapore !!!

Our local moneylenders' rates suck so much, I changed 350 in Singapore at a rate of 1 Sing dollar for 8400 dong, in Vietnam it was 9400 dong. Hell of a difference, it is. When you are soliciting services from young hot Vietnamese women on the street, every extra dollar counts, take it from me.

4. Use a travel guide book.

Get one of those guidebooks and research on the places to visit, sleep, eat. I used footprint Vietnam guide that we got from the library, it was pretty good , very detailed and also gives you the estimated cost for the attractions/transport so you don't get ripped off by tour operators. And believe me, some will try and rip you off, especially the cyclo drivers. Make sure you confirm prices before you do anything, and ask if there is any other costs for the whole trip.

5. Know how to ride a motorbike/bicycle.

Motorbike rentals are pretty cheap (I think it was 10000 dong for a day), so its a good option for less busy towns like Nha Trang and Dalat. You can get a bicycle for even cheaper, I think like 2000 dong. Beats the hell out of walking.

6. Don't bother about vehicles when you cross the road in Ho Chin Minh/Saigon

Seriously. In Ho Chin Minh it's the responsibility of the motorcyclists to avoid you rather than the other way around. Yes it sounds crazy but its true. But please take note that I am pretty sure this only applies for bicycles and motorbikes, I haven't tried it with cars or buses, but you are welcome to try and feedback to me.

7. Don't trust people's answers when you ask them how long a train/night bus journey takes.

The hotel receptionist informed us that it takes 5 hours from Saigon to Nha Trang by train, and another told us it was 4 from Nha Trang to Dalat. We ended up taking 7 and 6 hours respectively. It is safer to ask the train or bus operator what time you will reach your destination and calculate the time yourselves.

That's about it I guess. Yes some of it might seem like common sense to you, but please do note that it was my first backpacking trip, and I had lots of distractions and suffering from really bad cramps before the trips....fine I am a stupid dumbass for not checking the weather,that's what you wanna hear right?? You happy now?? Makes you feel good to put down others doesn't it?

Big Ass Mistake In KL

Don't you just hate it when you prepare a demo the day before and it works fine, but on the actual day it completely screws up?

I gave a presentation and did a demo in a research institute in KL yesterday; I had spent a good deal of time preparing and testing the demo the day before. However when I did the demo after the presentation it screwed up unexpectedly which was more than a little embarassing, considering how I had hyped up our product during the presentation. I figured out later that the reason for the screw up was my demo server ran out of disk space. Grrr.

Oh and I also accidentally said "big ass" during the presentation. I was like "you don't really need a big ass server to do ...", invoking quite a bit of laughter from the students there, however the researchers themselves didn't seem to happy about it. Still got a token gift from them after the presentation though, that was nice.

It's good to be back to work.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Stallion Reporting from Dalat

I am currently in Nha Trang, a very nice and laidback part of Vietnam, in contrast to the hectic pace of Saigon. However, I learned one thing on my first backpacking trip - always check the weather forcast of a place you thinking of visiting. Hey it was my FIRST backpacking trip alright give me a break.

Yep it's been raining practically non-stop the whole day since I came here. Nha Trang is famos for its beach but I ain't gonna get a chance to check it out thanks to the god-awful weather. However the food here is really cheap and pretty good, if you are ever here check out the Banana Split Cafe, amazing food they have.

Alright I'm outta here, will be heading off to Dalat tommorow morning where I will be till Sunday, after which I will head back to Saigon in the morning and (hopefully) catch the plane back to Singapore.

Friday, December 02, 2005

1st day in Saigon

All I can say is the gals here are hot. Really hot. And somehow a lot of them like to wear really low cleavage baring tops, not that I am complaining.

The roads are pretty scary though, almost as bad as the traffic conditions in hyderabad; crossing a traffic junction is an experience almost everytime.

However, we kinda struck out with the two eating places we went to for lunch and dinner - locals kept recommending really expensive ( 3 dollars a dish) places that turned out to be rather disappointing.

Anyway that's all for today, didn't have much success in finding my future bride-to-be, there were a few promising ones but they were too old (above 21).

Oh finally the streets are especially crazy tonight, due to the fact that Vietnam beat Malaysia in the SEA games soccer semi-finals. It's noisy as hell, don't think I am gonna get any sleep tonight. But these people are really patriotic, we could see people waving flags and shouting way after the match ended. You don't really see that kind of fervour in Singapore, at least not since the Malaysia Cup days.

I'm leaving on a jet plane....

I am off to Saigon, Vietnam later to find myself a hot nubile Vietnamese chick the answer to the meaning of my life. Will be back on the 11th. Will try to update on my progress if I can, but no gurantees - wish me luck!

I am off to Saigon
To look for something that might not be found
A week and a half, there I will be
Hopefully I can update my progresson this blog periodically.

p.s. What? Its bloody 5:30 am alright, how good a rhyme do you expect?

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Google Map for GoogleTalk users



If you are a Google Talk user, you could add yourself to this site map. I don't really use Google Talk to be honest, but the idea of having my name on a map of the world just seemed to cool to pass up.

Go to the site, scroll to Singapore and you will see yours truly. Isn't that like the coolest thing you ever seen??

Yes I know, I need a life.

N-gage just isn't engaging anyone

Remember all the hype and media buzz when N-Gage was released here? Well Nokia just killed the product after really horrid sales and the presence of much better mobile gaming alternatives (PSP anyone?).

I can still remember trying hard not to laugh every time I saw people trying to have a conversation using the phone, I couldn't believe how anyone could voluntarily let themselves look that stupid in public.

Link to story: No new N-Gages until 2007

Monday, November 28, 2005

Absurd Inventions

Found this hilarious website where you can find details of some of the worst patented inventions by Americans. A sample:



This is the baby cage, a nice contraception to protect a baby's fragile body from its parents in case they roll over in their sleep. Also provides the baby with the nice comfortable experience of being behind bars.

Another one of my favourites:

The "Bunny Syringe". A nice tool that rids kids of their fear of syringes. And introduces a fear of pink bunnies.

Links:
site | digg

Friday, November 25, 2005

Harry Potter In Space

Interesting article about how NASA beamed Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire to their astronauts in space, after one of the astronauts requested it. Not sure why the guy asked for that particular movie though, if it was me I would have asked for Backdoor Sluts 4 instead.

Speaking of the Goblet of Fire, did anyone find it as enjoyable as I did? I am asking because everyone I know thought it sucked and I can't fathom why. It was deliciously darker and more adult-oriented than the previous installments (some scenes kinda frightened me) and there was no more of those annoyingly kiddish elements that existed in the first two Potter movies. It did drag a little in the middle, but the climatic encounter between Potter and Voldermont was well worth the wait. The V man is one badass mutha******.

I am really looking forward to the next movie now, it will probably have some nudity and lots of blood and gore, judging by the way the series is progressing.

RAZR gets an upgrade, Nokia's iPod Killer

I been wanting to get the Motorola RAZR (my T610 seems hopelessly outdated now), but the limited memory and the crappy VGA camera put me off.

Well now there is more reason to wait, as Motorola just announced a new version of the phone to address those two shortcomings, the RAZR v3i which comes with a 1.2 megapixel camera and a micro-SD slot. Oh and it also comes with mobile iTunes.

But Nokia is also coming out with a new phone, the N91,dubbed the iPod killer, it will allow users to transfer songs to each other via Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It will be released in the 1st quarter of 2006. It's all very exciting ain't it?

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Another excuse for guys not to use protection

Guys hate condoms. A lot of guys would rather risk contracting an incurable STD or an unplanned pregnancy than wear one. That is probably what prompted male scientists in china to come up with this contraceptive for women. Behold the Liquid Condom:



Yes, it is a foam based contraceptive that "forms a physical membrane inside the vagina, protecting it from infection"

Of course, the idea of spraying foam into their privates might not seem that appealing to women so the manufacturers are also marketing it as a feminine hygiene product; they claim "daily use of this product can help maintain genital hygiene and prevent infection by pathogens".

Click title of the post to read the article.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Daters blame Match.com for lack of success

Match.com is an online dating site where subscribers can view other people's profiles and contact them. Recently some subscribers filed a lawsuit against the service, claiming that Match.com employees went on dates with them just to ensure that they would continue subscribing to the service. You can read about it here.

Apparently some male subscribers got suspicious when they started meeting women on the site way out of their league who surprisingly agreed to go out with them. The women later stopped answering their repeated and frantic phone calls after one or two amazing dates.

Alright I am kidding, they didn't really say how they found out about the scam. But my point is maybe the subscribers suing the service just have problems accepting rejection? A lot of people find rejection hard to take. Me? I had so many that it's practically a hobby.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Japanese Hand Job



There are times when every guy wants someone else to give them a handjob, instead of having to do it themselves. Hell I know I do. Well you guys no longer have to worry because the solution is at hand: The Japanese Hand Job Machine!

Yes this nifty gadget is really useful for those sticky (no pun intended) situations when you are too tired to jerk yourself off, or just wanna experience the wonderful feeling of a rubbery hand around their member. It retails for around US$290, but can you really put a price on orgasms?

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How to evade your National Service(NS) liability

In Singapore, all males have to serve two years of National Service in the military upon reaching 18 years of age. Anyone who evades it is liable for a 5k fine and/or 3 years of jail term.

Recently there was this case of a 49 year old local who evaded his NS, went to England to study at the Royal College of Music and went on to become a famous pianist. He came back recently and was fined an amount "he cannot remember". He will be performing at the Esplanade next month. Compare that to a case in 1994, where a French citizen who evaded his NS was arrested, fined and made to perform 9 months of training.

So based on the above facts, this is how you can evade NS:

Pre-requisites:
1. 5k
2. A world-class talent in any discipline (piano, painting, porn star, WWE wrestler)

Then simply return to Singapore once you are world-renowned and show remorse for evading your NS. Follow that by offering to perform in Singapore.

Damn it, if only I knew about this when I was 18. I would have evaded my NS and gone to US to be a porn star. With my 50 inch "talent" it would have only been a matter of time before I was world-renowned.

The news article about the case can be found here.

Monday, November 21, 2005

I don't get sushi

I just don't get what is so great about it. Went to this place called sakae sushi at Citylink yesterday for dinner with a couple of friends. They were happily gorging themselves on that salmon sashimi thingy. I tried a couple and ..well ....I guess it was alright - if you like your food bland with that unique uncooked taste!

Tried adding more wasabe(sp?) to give it more flavor, and I ended up crying my eyes out. And what's the deal with the expensive prices anyway? 3 pieces of raw salmon went for 6.50!! All the chef needs to do is cut the salmon, and for that he charges you two bucks a slice? Why aren't fishmongers tapping into this market? They could sell their regular raw fish but then have a special "sushi" section where they sell ...err... raw fish. Wait that doesn't make sense, they could just convert their entire stall into a sushi shop and sell "cookable" sushi.

Maybe it's an Indian thing, I am used to having my food with spices and some flavor, so just not used to food without either of them. But then again I do know some Indians who like sushi. Maybe it's just me.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

The end of in-camp

Yes I have just finished my 2 weeks of intensive, gruelling classroom training of in-camp training. It has been nothing short of an ordeal I tell ya, at one point I wasn't even sure if I would make it out in one piece.

Yes you might ask how gruelling classroom training could be, but let me tell you it's no child's play. Some days we were forced to watch really bad army movies for long periods of time. Other days they were so cruel that they only allowed us 1 hour lunch break instead of two; apparently the term "nap time" doesn't mean anything to those assholes.

I wish I could talk more about my training, but it's classified. Hell, even the head of our unit told us that his own wife doesn't know what he is doing. And that if one day she finds out he will be forced to kill her. It's THAT classified. So yeah unless you have a death wish do not ever ask me about my military training. If you do I might just have to use my highly classified "dragon's death blow" that I learnt last week. You have to be warned.

Anyway yesterday was the final day, and as we walked out of the gates a whole horde of people were waiting outside. Yes the wives and girlfriends of my fellow mates had gathered outside the camp to welcome them back. But of course there was no one waiting for me. So I walked away forlornly as everyone else kissed and hugged their wives and girlfriends. Maybe one day there will be someone waiting for me outside the camp.

I was in camp for the last weeks.
The food was so bad it made me sick.
What I learnt those two weeks is highly classified.
So much so that even to his wife my unit head had lied.
The days and night passed by torturous and slow
But at least I learnt the dragon's death blow.
Oh and I also found another source of joy
'Cos all around the camp were half-naked teenage boys

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Mom/Army Rants

Mom annoyed me again yesterday. One of my clothes fell off the pole and onto the pavement while she was drying them and she wanted me to go down and get them. I was doing some important research (fine was watching porn) on my PC at that time so I asked her to give me a quick sec. To which she said (in Tamil, but I'm translating) - "Please get them now before someone takes it, you are a good boy aren't ya?"

Arrgh I burn with anger every time she refers to me as a good boy. I am 27 and working and doing lots of other adult stuff (hookers, porn) but she is still calling me a boy! Fine, I still live with my parents, but that doesn't mean I ain't a man does it? I got so pissed that I pulled out a thong from my clothes drawer, wriggle it in front of her and asked her if she knows any "boys" who wear underwear as sexy as that. The look on her face was priceless, I don't think she would call me a boy anytime in the near future.

Satisfied with my victory, I then went downstairs to retrieve the clothing. Turns out it was my favorite pajamas, the one with the little Popeye faces on them. That got me feeling a bit guilty about what I did earlier, I would have been upset if someone had taken them. But hell she still shouldn't have called me a good boy.

Speaking of boys, I been seeing a lot of hunky, shirtless 18 year old boys recently. Yes I am been going back to army camp everyday for the past week for my reservist training. Hasn't been fun I tell ya. The food is really horrid (I have seen dog food that looked more appetizing) and having to get up at 5:30 in the morning everyday and traveling 3 hours a day just makes it more fun.

Oh and my old army uniform doesn't fit anymore as well, I had to leave the top button undone (it's button-fly) to get them on. I don't get it, would it kill the army to pay more for uniforms that don't shrink after a couple of years? Alright I know I should stop whining, it's unbecoming of a soldier.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Britney's Hubby Raps!

You probably heard about this unless you been living under a rock, but there was recently a leaked mp3 of Kevin Federline (Britney's hubby) soon to be released single, Ya'll Ready. If you haven't heard it, go get a clip of the single here. It's not the entire song, but I doubt anyone in their right mind would want to hear the entire song.

He is so bad that he makes Vanilla Ice sound like Tupac. He is so bad that I think it could just be a prank played on him, that someone else made that god-awful song and put the blame on him just to get some laughs. Really, no one this bad would be allowed to make a single, let alone an album. Or would they?

Credit: Link to the clip was taken from The Superficial.

Friday, November 04, 2005

Loss of Humor Explained

More than one person has commented to me that my entries have lost their sense of humor. And hell even I have to agree, so I decided to explain why. Disclaimer: If you are a staunch Christian read no further.

I have recently gained an interest in extreme metal bands. I been listening to bands whose names include Carcass, Death, Rotting Christ, Pig Destroyer etc. And after listening to the abovementioned bands I have realized the truth - that life isn't that funny after all. In fact it downright sucks. There is no God, there is only the Dark One aka Satan, the guardian of all metal bands, and to him alone I answer.

I don't even know why I bother living anymore. I am probably gonna die a lonely and miserable anal virgin anyway, if I am lucky enough not to be murdered or run over by a bus in the near future. And the same fate probably is waiting for you too. You know it.

So yeah don't expect anymore funny posts from me. Instead look forward to reading about how I torch rabbits and kittens as well as performing other despicable acts in the near future

K now most of you probably think I lost my marbles, so I urge you all to go check out the abovementioned bands before you judge me. I am willing to bet one headless chicken that you will be as enlightened as I am now after listening to them.

I have also changed my dressing to reflect my new sense of being. Check out my new look:


Me out camping in the woods

For more pictures like these, please go here

Thursday, November 03, 2005

A friend I introduced to Last.fm

An MSN chat I had earlier :

--Start of Chat --

Jixuan says:
actually i really love last fm

P Android says:
and who do you have to thank for it ?

Jixuan says:
huh? no idea

P Android says:
you know. the person who intro you to it?

Jixuan says:
??

P Android says:
didnt you just say "you really love last fm"?

Jixuan says:
?

Jixuan says:
yawnz damn tired

P Android says:
Jixuan says:
actually i really love last fm


P Android says:
thats what you said

Jixuan says:
argh

P Android says:
was that you ?

P Android says:
answer me!!!!

Jixuan says:
ya la ya la

-End of Chat--

Sigh people forgot so easily what others do for them, it's sad that I have to constantly remind them.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Word of the day

virago

1. A woman of extraordinary stature, strength, and courage.
2. A woman regarded as loud, scolding, ill-tempered, quarrelsome, or overbearing.

It's kinda cool how a word can be used both as a form of great praise as well as an insult.If someone calls you a virago, how would you know which meaning they are actually using?

Last.fm

Discovered this a week ago and been in love with it since. It's a streaming music station, but the songs it plays are personalised to your tastes.

I downloaded the last.fm player off the site, did a similar artist search for lamb of god and it returned me a station that played songs from similar artists. And unlike conventional streaming radio stations, you can skip a song that is currently playing if you don't like it or even ban it, which stops it from ever being played again.

In the past week I have discovered great bands like Cult of Luna, Isis and Fantomas; bands I would have never discovered on my own. Hell I love it so much that nowadays I rather listen to it then download porn at home, and that's not something I say about many things.

So if you are someone who is always looking for new bands or music to listen to, do yourself a favor and check this out. You will thank me for it!

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Flock Browser: The social Browser

This is a very early beta release but it sounds really promising. Basically Flock is a browser based on Mozilla Firefox but with a few really cool add-ons. One is a in-built blogging editing/publishing tool that allow integrates with your Flickr account if you have one. I am actually posting this using it!

Another is integration with an online bookmarks site de.li.cious which allows you to share as well as view other user's booksmarks. Got other pretty nifty features as well but you should check it out for yourself. Remember it is still a really release, so it is pretty buggy and lacking some features. To check out its other features and give it a try click here.

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Thursday, October 20, 2005

Google improves their search engine

Check it out, it's pretty amazing. Google recently upgraded their search engine to give you even more accurate hits to your queries.

*Go to Google
*Type in the word "Failure"
*Instead of clicking "Google Search," click "I'm Feeling Lucky."

Thanks to the always lovely Dawn for this.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Criss Angel blows

Like every cool kid back then, I wanted to be a magician.. I grew up seeing David Copperfield and being mesmerized, at that time I thought he really had magical powers. And I would believe that I had the same powers as well, all I needed to do was to unleash them. I would stare at my crappy breakfast for hours willing it to disappear, or trying to twist the head off the puppy I had back then (RIP Fluffy). But of course, it never worked and pretty soon I realized that it was all just clever illusions done with sleight of hand and props.

But that was until I saw Criss Angel. This guy completely blew me away. He did magic on the street with no props or camera tricks. I started to believe again in real magic. He did amazing things that couldn't be explained like levitating the woman in the middle of a crowded street. That was real magic. He was real. My faith was restored. I started staring at things again to make them disappear, but now I concentrated on women now because they were easier to stare at compared to breakfast. Some of them did disappear, well of their own free will mostly, once they catch me staring at them.

But all that changed a week ago. I was at my favorite unexplained mysteries forum (which is a forum where people discuss alien abductions and the magical powers that they have) when someone posted that Criss was a fake. I got pissed off that someone would criticize the man I hold in such esteem, so I replied and asked him if he could explain the levitation magic he did. To which the guy laughed and said I was a loser and it was an obvious fake and only a dumbass like me wouldn't know it. He then told me to "look at the shoes" and I would know what he meant. Yes people at the forum love to talk in cryptic messages for some reason.

That evening I visited Criss Angel's website like I did everyday, but something felt wrong. I played the levitation clip again. But this time I looked at the chick's feet. And then I saw it. The guy was right, it was an obvious fake. He was a fake. Go see for yourselves. While the lady was being held by the men her right foot was on the top of the left. But when they let her go, her left foot was on top. It was two different shots. The 2nd shot was probably where they did some video editing or used some prop to put her in that position.

So I am telling you guys now, there is no such thing as magic. Don't believe in anything magical, you will only be disappointed, like I did.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The 40 year old virgin

Went to watch the movie The 40 year old virgin last Friday, it was absolutely hilarious. I haven't laughed this hard since my aunt's funeral(Hey she was a mean bitch who used to force me to eat my vegetables). The friend I went with didn't seem to enjoy it so much though, I barely heard her laugh the whole time. Humor is pretty subjective I guess.

But yeah watching the movie, I couldn't help but feel that the lead character reminded me so much of myself. He was sweet, humble and an overall nice guy who just couldn't get laid no matter how much he tried. K he wasn't that good looking but that's like the only difference.

But yeah it also reminded me of the time when I lost my virginity. I was 12, and she was this hot Italian model from...err...Italy. It was the best 5 minutes of my life, and probably hers as well. I will never forget it. Of course it wasn't something I could easily forget, considering the fact I contracted gonorrhea from her. But the less said about that, the better.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Flight attendants call for boycott of Flightplan

I ain't sure about other countries, but in Singapore, flight attendants are often unfairly stereotyped by many as being complete bimbos.

I admit I do have the same bias towards many of them because of an unpleasant encounter in the past, but after reading this article in the papers today, it's kinda hard not to. Apparently, flight attendants in US are outraged over the new Jodie Foster movie Flightplan and are calling for a boycott of the movie, with the spokesman of the Association of Flight Attendants (AFA) saying that it portrays them in a bad light and undermines "the layer of trust between the passengers and the crew".

A Disney spokesperson responded that she is "confident the public will be able to discern the difference between fiction and the incredible job real-life flight attendants do". Which we all know is just a really diplomatic way of saying "It's a fucking movie, you dumbasses. It isn't real."

What's next? Lawyers suing film companies for portraying them as greedy, manipulative and unethical? Or Native Americans suing for always being portrayed as wise, spiritual men who have the ability to see into the future and say dumb things like "The spirit of the wolf is strong in you"? Or Chinese actors for always being typecasted as shopkeepers, restaurant owners or some martial arts expert and speak bad funny English?

Dark Water is as Scary as my Ass....

And I got a pretty fine ass (I do 200 butt clenches a day), so that tells you how "scary" the movie was. Yes, I went to see it yesterday, it was a spur of the moment decision, and it turned out to be, pretty much, a waste of money.

Actually the movie would have been bearable if I didn't go in expecting to be frightened at least a little, it had a half decent plot. Jennifer Connelly was pretty good in her role as a single mother with a lot of emotional baggage, trying to raise her kid while fighting a child custody battle with her ex-husband. And the kid was pretty good as well, she was sweet but not so annoyingly cute like so many other child actors that you feel like putting your hands around her neck and squeezing the cuteness out of her.

But there was not a single moment when I felt the least bit scared. It felt more like a psychological drama than a horror movie. The movie ended after an hour and a half, leaving me feeling incredibly frustrated; I haven't felt this frustrated since that one horrible night in this hotel room (you try getting it up after 10 tequila shots!).

I have noticed that it's a common problem with horror movies nowadays. Either they turn out to be really scary but the plot makes absolutely no sense, hence leaving the movie-goer feeling disengaged and confused. Or they are like Dark Water , decent plot but falling short on the horror bit. And of course there are those that suck at both. Maybe that's why I loved Shutter so much. Shutter was a Thai movie I saw last year; it scared the shit out of me, but it also had a very engaging plot.


I went to watch Dark Water.
Now I wish I hadn't bothered.
Jennifer Connelly was pretty hot.
But a horror movie it was not.
I realise now that ang mohs can't make good horror movies
They should just leave that to the Thai people and the Japanese.



p.s. I haven't seen the original Japanese version, is it any better?

p.p.s Ang moh not considered racist right? *Worried*

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Scary website

Got this from a friend. It's one of those horror websites that try to scare you, but it's done in a very subtle and interesting way. Check it out (click the title of the post), but only if you don't mind getting a scare.

Monday, September 26, 2005

To keep or not to keep?

Was reading this blog entry where the writer found a digital camera in the cab she was in. She surrendered it to the cab driver.

It was a rather admirable thing to do. But if I was in that situation, I would have kept it. Why? Because I have lost my wallet thrice, and I didn't get it back on all three occasions. That it pissed me off. So why should I care about someone who lost their digital camera, especially someone who I don't even know? Of course it works both ways. So if it ever happens to me, I would just accept it and blame my own carelessness, rather than lament the fact that no one was honest enought to return it.

I have to admit that it sounds like (and probably is) a selfish attitude to have. But past experiences have taught me that it is pointless to be nice to everyone. So now I reserve my caring for people who I really care about, people who I feel deserve it.

So what would you do in this situation?

Thursday, September 22, 2005

I wish upon a star..

I wish I could blog about work. Seriously. The things that go on in my workplace are unbelievably hilarious at times. But I can't. So I shall talk about MSN 7.5 instead.

Yes if you didn't know, M$ just came out with their latest version of their Messenger and added 0.5 more functionality. Basically the ability to send short voice messages to your contacts. You just click on a button and talk to the mic (for no more than 15 secs) and it sends it over to your contact.

Been having quite a bit of fun with it the last week. I been sending really crazy voice messages to female friends. Messages like "Woooo Wooo" (you know, like a ghost), or changing my voice to make myself sound like some psycho pervert, which isn't much of a stretch I have to admit.

Also sang "Unbreak my heart" by Toni Braxton to another gal whom I have had an eye on for a while. Her reaction was kinda disappointing. You shouldn't really laugh when some guy sings you a love song do you? Alright, I know it makes me sound like a complete loser with no life, but I assure you that it's more fun that it sounds. I tried sending voice messages to some of my guy friends as well, but they blocked me. Not really sure why.

Anyway if you are interested in hearing my sexy voice, you can add me using my MSN addy in my blogger profile. Ladies only.

Friday, September 09, 2005

To Switch or not to Switch?

Let's say you are on a gameshow. The hosts shows you 3 doors, 2 have goats behind them while 1 has a car. The host then asks you to pick one door. After you do that, he opens one of the doors that you did NOT pick and reveals a goat. He then asks you if you would like to change your choice and switch to the other door, or keep your original choice.

The question: Do the odds of you getting the car increase if you switch? Or is it 50%, so it doesn't matter if you switch or not?

The puzzle is actually a very famous one. In 1990, Marilyn vos Savant published her answer to the puzzle in her newspaper columm and immediately got thousands of letters claiming she was wrong, some of which were PHD holders and professional mathematicians.

Anyway I got this puzzle from a book I am reading now called "the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" by mark haddon, a story about an autistic teenager with amazing memory and logic skills who tries to solve the murder of his neighbour's dog in the style of his favourite detective, Sherlock Holmes. It's quite an amazing read so far, highly recommended.

Update: The answer (this is for you, Frankie):

1st Choice
/ | \
G1 G2 C
S/ \NS S/ \NS S/ \NS <--- 2nd choice after Host reveals one goat
C G1 C G2 GX C


G1 - Goat 1
G2 - Goat 2
GX - Either Goat
C - Car
S - Switch
NS - Not Switch


As you can see from all the possible outcomes in the badly illustrated diagram, you get 2 out of 3 chances to get a car when you switch, and only 1 out of 3 chances when you don't.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

I like to see penguins getting bashed with clubs

Yep, that's the truth. . I actually derive a certain pleasure from seeing it, being the horrible meat-eater that I am. Click the title of the post to do the same (Shockwave Flash needed). For the record, my highest score is 322.9.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Dating and Sex

I was at Borders checking out chicks browsing books a couple days ago when the title of a book caught my eye. It was "A True Story of 1001 Nights Without Sex" by Suzanne Schlosberg. I guess I noticed it because I a friend I know could relate to the title. Anyway I picked it up and started reading it, and pretty soon I found myself giggling like a little schoolgirl. Yeah it was a pretty funny book. Basically, the book is about the author's "streak" of going without sex after her break-up and her attempts to break it without resorting to one night stands. So she tries a multitude of ways to find a mate, from speed dating to match.com to moving to a completely different state, with mostly disastrous but funny results.

A couple of excerpts from the book:

"Eliminating men who sent e-mails like 'My best friend is my hairless little dog' ..." - Her match.com filtering policy

"I did make a mental note that he appeared to be showing the same amount of excitement toward my breasts as one might show toward, say' a pair of mouldy tomatoes." - About her first sexual partner, who, unsurprisingly, turned out to be gay.

Highly recommended, especially if you can relate to horrible dating experiences. Or as in my case, have a friend who can.

Fine fine I don't have a friend, it's me. Jesus, you people are so quick to judge aren't ya. Anyway it got me thinking about my own dating experiences, I had some really horrid ones which seem awfully funny now I think of them. And that got me thinking about the man-dates that I have had, and how most of them turned out to be rather pleasant experiences. And that got me comparing my dates with women and men and the advantages and disadvantages of each. And well this is what I came up with:

1. Conversation

With female date - You gotta be polite and not make any crude remarks or risk offending her. ("Wait a minute, you aren't wearing a bra are you?")

With male date - Screw politeness, you can pretty much say or cuss anything you want ("That fucking waiter glared at me, what the hell is wrong with a man date?? Asshole!")

2. Paying attention

With female date - You have to try and focus all your attention on your date, and not on other women, not even for a second. Not even if some hot gal gives you a wink and flashes cleavage at you. Or comes up to you and sits on your lap during dinner. Alright the latter didn't happen to me, but that's only because I didn't return her wink in the first place.

With male date - Hell he would probably join you in ogling at the hot girl.

3. Accidental touching

With female date - If you touch some forbidden part of your date accidentally, that's it. You can apologize all you want but it doesn't matter, you will probably be labeled a sexual predator by her and whoever she complains to for the rest of your natural life.

With male date - If you touch some forbidden part of your date accidentally, you both just pretend it didn't happen. I have accidentally touched a guy's butt during a man date, after which he casually asked me where we were going for dinner. Totally cool, it's like it never happened.

4. Uncomfortable silences

Female date - I hate these. You are suddenly left with nothing to say and it gets all quiet and weird. And then you start figeting and picking at the pimple at your face and it goes all downhill from there.

Male date - It never happens. Even if you run out of things to say there's always a) soccer ("So Man Utd really suck nowadays eh?") and b) army ("So what camp were you in?")

5. End of the date pleasantries

Female date - You gotta be nice and say you have a good time even if you didn't.
Male date - Pleasantries? It's brutal honesty baby. ("I have had a better time with my dog, asshole")

6. Sexual tension between you and your date

Female date - Exciting and incredible feeling, even if most of the time I seem to be the only one feeling that tension.

Male date - It only happened once. And...well I would rather not talk about it anymore.

7. Getting lucky

Female date - I have the possibility of getting lucky at the end of the date. (hey, it has to happen sometime right? Like hello, it's simple probability!)

Male date - The only way he's getting lucky with me is if we were in prison.

So it seems like there are more pluses to man dates compared to woman dates for me. Maybe I should start going out with guys more often.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Album of the Year

It's nearing the year's end and I just wanna highlight my pick for album of the year. This album just blew the competition away in my opinion, and is destined to be a classic. That album is Hillary Duff's Most Wanted.

Yes, the 17 year old teen-rock princess has recently released a greatest hits album after a successful career spanning TWO years during which she had released TWO albums. And it's a brilliant one, including hits like "So Yesterday" and ...err..other hits. I can't wait for her next greatest hits album, which will probably contain the remaining songs from the last 2 albums as well as previously unreleased songs she sang as a toddler.

I guess she released the album as a tribute to her fans who stuck with her during the last two years, during which she had gone through a lot of changes in her life. You know, changes like puberty. And her fans have responded by sending the album to the top of the Billboard albums chart.

And to those who think the album is a pathetic attempt to rip off her dumb fans who probably have both her previous albums, you are wrong. She has included FOUR, count them, four new tracks for them, so that they don't feel like an idiot when they realize they already have most of the songs on this album. Oh and some of the new songs were co-written by her 27 year old boyfriend from Good Charlotte, so you can bet they will be good.

Normally I would be a little disturbed by the fact that a 27 year old guy finds it alright to date a 17 year old teenager, but then again, considering the maturity of the music that Good Charlotte puts out, it isn't all that surprising.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Blogging Cliches

1. Apologising for not posting for such a long time.
2. Mentioning that you can't think of anything to write about.
3. Bitching about another blogger.
4. Writing about how lonely/alone/miserable you are/feel.
5. Bitching about how badly your ex treated you and didn't understand you.
6. Bitching about how your current bf/gf treats you and doesn't understand you.
7. Mentioning the words "blog", "blogging", "blogosphere" etc. in your post.
8. Mentioning how amazing the bf/gf is.
9. Plugging other bloggers repeatedly.
10.Posting pictures of cute bloggers.

Any more?

Disclaimer: Not directed to anyone in particular. Hell I been guilty of some of them as well.

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Really Funny Dog Video

Saw this video yesterday and thought it was really funny. It's a video of a very adorable but really dumb dog in action. Click title of post to see it. No I am not going for a whole dog theme this week, it's just a coincidence.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Animal Cruelty in Singapore is considered no big deal

I read about this animal cruelty case in the papers today. The guy left his Alaskan malamute ( an Artic sled dog) in his backyard without any water in direct sunlight. The dog died of heatstroke and was found with blood foaming at the mouth by a neighbour.

The owner could have claimed negligence and said that he did not know that an Artic dog (which has 2 layers of fur) left in a confined space without water and in direct sunlight would suffer heatstroke, if not for the fact that a previous complaint against him 2 years ago had resulted in an SPCA inspector inspecting his dog and advising him that the dog needed to be kept in an air-conditioned place or failing that, at at least he should put up blinds to shield the dog from direct sunlight. He ignored both suggestions.

The offence carried a maximum fine of 10k and a year's jail term. The guy got off with a 3k fine and no jail term. Unbelievable.

What's the point of a punishment if it doesn't even hurt the offender in question? Isn't that the whole purpose of a punishment, to deter the offender from repeating his crime? They might as well have just told him that he was a really really bad boy and make him promise not to do it again.

Offenders are rarely jailed in animal abuse cases here, even if the animal in question dies, as is the case here. It's just considered not that big a deal. Would the sentence have been different if it had been a child, instead of a dog? Definitely. But is it really that much different, both are pretty much defenceless and completely reliant on their caretakers for their well-being.

You know, if I was the judge, I would order the guy dressed up in winter clothing and then handcuffed and left in the middle of a field on a hot day, without water. Just to give him a taste of what it feels like. Then I will haul his ass down to jail for the full year.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

White couple with black friends

I stumbled onto this rather inspiring site started by a white couple, Sally and Johnny, about the how much black people love them. The testimonials page (from some of their black friends) is priceless. Here's some samples:

1. "Sally and Johnny recognize that as a black man, I'm an expert on self-defense and the ways of organized crime. Whenever they are about to go to a "bad" neighborhood, they ask me for my advice. That's phat."

2. "Sally is so thoughtful. She always tries to set me up with every black man she knows. Since we're both black that means my date and I will have so much in common."

I especially can relate to the 2nd one. I lost count of the number of times friends try hook me up with their Indian gal friends just because they are also Indian.

Click the title of the post to go to the site.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Evil thoughts

I have a confession to make. I been having really really evil thoughts about mommy. I know I shouldn't have them, but I can't help it. Yes, I am a little afraid that I might just snap one day and start cussing at her. I know I am evil to even think that, but she can be REALLY annoying and it is starting to get to me.

She called me at 12:30am on Tuesday, I was hanging out at Cafe Iguana with my cousin.

Mom: Where are you?
Me : Out with a friend.
Mom: (Almost shouting) Don't you have work tomorrow? Why are you not home and sleeping yet? How are you gonna wake up tomorrow to go to work?
Me: Thank you for reminding me of my responsibilities mom. I am rushing home right now.

Of course it was just a lie to appease her anger. I hanged up the phone and stayed at the pub. For almost 10 more minutes. Yep, the poor woman could no longer control me like she used to.

Then yesterday I was out with a friend at Coffee Club at Siglap. At 9 pm. Guess who calls again.

Mom: Where are you?
Me : Out with a friend?
Mom: Why are you out late every night nowadays? Are you doing drugs? Or hookers? TELL ME!!
Me : Late? It's 9 pm mom.
Mom: Exactly, you should be in bed now!

Yes see what I have to put up with. Alright maybe I am being a bit unfair, she isn't always like that. I mean, she does let me stay out till 1 am on weekends, provided it's an all guy outing.

I don't know but I been feeling that my bad luck with women could have something to do with her. I know it sounds silly but I can't help feeling that way.

God, help me erase these evil thoughts from my mind.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Slipknot Gig

My neck hurts and my ears are still ringing. But it's all worth it because I had a blast at the gig. Yeah haven't had this much fun in a long long time, I was jumping and headbanging and basically acting like a raving idiot. And I wasn't the only one.

Oh and gotta thank my cousin who works at Brewerkz, he got us free alcohol before we went for the gig and by the time we got to Fort Canning we were sufficiently wasted. And after the concert we went back to Cafe Iguana for more free booze. I suddenly feel closer to him than I ever felt before, I think I will be hanging out with him more often from now on.

Ha I was so wasted and pumped up with adrenalin that I asked this cute Indian chick with a really great ass smile beside me for her number, but she declined me. Alright on hindsight it wasn't a surprise, I wasn't exactly very smooth in my approach. I just tapped her on her shoulder and asked her if I could have her number. Didn't introduce myself or anything. Hey I was under the influence ok, give me a break.

So on the remote chance that the cute Indian chick googles for "Slipknot at Fort Canning" and gets to this page, I would like to tell you that I am usually more suave (and less crazy looking) so if you ever change your mind, let me know and we go out for drinks or something.

Oh and I almost forgot, they handed out free CDs to everyone who attended the gig. It's a full length CD of different artists on the Roadrunner label, but its mostly Goth (Cradle of Filth) and nu-metal bands (Ill Nino). They do have a few great metal bands like Killswitch Engage and Devildriver on it though, the latter I haven't heard of before but I am definitely going to check out.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Wedding Crashers

Went to watch Wedding Crashers with a guy friend and 2 recent female acquaintances. It was a really funny movie, haven't laughed that hard in a long while, but if you gonna catch it make sure you check your brain at the door. The humor is very American Pie, involving a lot of sex jokes and digs at homosexuality. Christopher Walken was criminally underused though. Oh and eventhough it was
NC16 they still snipped off some scenes, one of which was really obvious and really annoying, I really wanted to see Dr Quinn's boobs,.

I just realised that the lines I been using on women don't really work anymore, that could be the reason for my recent spat of bad luck with women folk. Told one of the gals that this was the first time I took a gal to a movie at Cineleisure, I was hoping she would be touched. But she pointed out that a week ago I wrote in my blog about taking out a female friend to a movie there as well. Talk about an awkward moment. Damn you, you popular, widely-read blog. You have become a liability.

In a couple of hours I am off to Fort Canning Park to go see Slipknot in concert. Can't wait, I been bored out of my mind recently, so am really looking forward to a a night of loud, angry music with self-loathing lyrics. Hope it doesn't rain though.

ROCK NEVER DEATHS!!!

Friday, August 12, 2005

Riot police needed to handle 4 demonstrators

Gotta thank my friend for showing me this, this is really funny shit. Only in Singapore do you need 40 police officers (including fully geared riot police) to deal with 4 protestors who were apparently just standing around with signs. Oh and 2 of the protestors were women.


The rowdy protestors....

And the full force of the law called to deal with them.

Now you know why riots are practically unheard of in Singapore. Hell I would have probably pissed in my pants if I saw 10 riot policemen coming after me. Gotta give them credit, they have balls (even the two women).

Click the title of this post to get the full story.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

I am gonna get a new PC

Yes I am! Just ordered my brand new PC from Dell an hour ago, it's gonna cost me around 2 grand. I have no choice, Porn Machine 1 (that's what I call my current PC) has been stuttering quite a bit recently, now it hangs almost everytime I boot up.

The new PC (which I shall christen with the name Porn Machine 2) is gonna come with a DVD-Writer! Thank god for that, you have no idea how troublesome it has been for me to get all those videos transferred to CDs everytime my hard disk got full. And it comes with a 19-inch monitor as well, the better to watch videos with. Can't wait for it to be delivered, haven't felt this excited since my last sexual experience.

Oh and I bought my ticket to Slipknot's concert on the 16th (I think) as well. I been contemplating about whether or not to go, I ain't really into them anymore. It's weird, I was such a huge fan after I heard their self-titled, but now I listen to the same album and it sounds so tired. It's weird how your tastes change as you grow older. But they are known for their theatrics so hopefully I will enjoy myself there, I really need the distraction.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Skin and Bad Service

Watched Mysterious Skin with my friend J yesterday, a rather disturbing movie about two boys who were molested by their baseball coach and how it affected them - one becomes a reclusive introvert, the other a teen prostitute. Definitely not easy to watch considering the subject matter and some pretty graphic scenes, but I highly recommend it nonetheless.

Had another bad experience at another restaurant at Cineleisure, it's the one beside Subway. Firstly they served us our main courses before the salad we ordered, and J's Alfredo was drowned in cream sauce and she could only manage a few mouthfuls before she gave up. We called the waitress and told her about it, she nodded her head and went away. And never came back.

So we called another waiter over and repeated our complaints, and he offered to replace the Alfredo. J was by this point was feeling sick because of the cream overdose so didn't have the appetite to eat. So she asked if they could waive the price for the Alfredo. To which the waitress replied "I'm sorry but we keyed it in to the register, so we can't do that". RIGHT. So I guess if you key in the wrong order the customer has no choice but to pay for it eh?

Anyway she called another of her colleagues who came over. Again we repeated our story to him, and he was like "Tell me what you want and I will do it for you". Which I thought sounded a bit wrong but I let it go. But when we asked that the Alfredo be removed from the bill he was like "I'm not sure I can do that, let me get my manager."

So the manager came and went "I'm the manager. What you want?". At that point we realized where the waiters/waitresses got their excellent customer service skills from. J told her that we had already repeated our complaint to 3 waiters before her, and if it was really necessary to repeat it once more. The manager went "Ya!". So we did that and her response was customers in the past feedback that the Alfredo was too dry and that was why they made it more creamy. RIGHT.

Have to clarify that we weren't really looking for compensation in the beginning, but at least an acknowledgement and an apology, rather than giving ignoring us or giving lame ass excuses like it has already been keyed in the register. In the end they offered J a complimentary drink of iced tea which was in a smaller glass than the one she had earlier. (I guess that's their complimentary glass size).

So I am wondering where are the places with really good service without being too ex (15-20 for main course). I know Brewerkz is definitely one. Can anyone recommend anymore?

Oh and I told J about what happened with my bag and how my horrid friend refused to give up the scoop of ice cream that was rightfully mine. She replied "And you wonder why you are still single." Sigh, what does a guy have to do to get any sympathy around here?

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Wax and Chocolate

Went to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory a couple days ago with a gal friend. The poor gal was so excited to see me that she left her handphone in the office when she left to meet me. It's good to know I still have that effect on women.

We decided to grab dinner at this new place at Cineleisure before the movie. So there we having a really nice conversation (we were sharing our daily skin regimes with each other) when the waiter interrupted us. I noticed him checking me out since the moment we walked in but I didn't wanna make a big fuss. Anyway, he came over on the pretense of lighting the candle thingy on our table. He picked it up to light it but it was obvious that he was more interested in ogling at me. Suddenly he to dropped the candle holder on the seat beside me. Where my bag was.

I looked in horror at the candle wax now spreading rapidly all over my bag and I had to really control myself, I could feel tears welling in my eyes. Hey, the bag had a real sentimental value for me alright, it was bought for me by mom when I got my degree in university and I promised her that I will treasure and keep it clean always. Now that promise was broken.

Anyway, the waiter apologized profusely and started wiping the wax off my bag but the damage was already done. My friend thought it was all very funny, I was really tempted to grab the candle holder and throw it on her bag but being the gentleman that I am, I controlled myself. Later they tried to make it up to us by giving us an extra scoop of ice cream during dessert. I asked my friend to give up her extra scoop to me because it was my bag that got ruined but she blatantly refused. Can you believe that people like that exist?

About the movie, it was pretty good, almost magical at times. But I thought the ending was a little draggy, they added a pretty lame subplot involving Wonka's dad that I thought was unnecessary and out of place.


I don't know if it's karma but my PC died yesterday, can't even boot up.

Friday, July 29, 2005

An encounter with an older woman

I was walking back home a couple days ago when I noticed this rather mature woman staring at me. Yup it's pretty strange but ever since I got my facial I been getting looks from more people, especially cute Indian waiters and older women. But still it was nice to be ogled at (wonder why women complain about this all the time), even if the ogling isn't from my preferred demographic.

So I kept walking and I noticed the woman picking up speed as if trying to catch up to me. I started to get a little worried, what if she turned out to be some acid throwing stalker? So I instinctively covered my face with my right hand and walked faster, but her footsteps also quickened. Then suddenly I heard my name being called. I turned around and realized that she was the Indian lady from the adjacent block, we exchange pleasantries once in a while (it's an Indian thing to acknowledge each other even if you don't know each other) but that's it.

Me: Hi Auntie. What's up?
Auntie: Been looking for you. Would you come to my house ....and....and check on my daughter's computer? It's down.

I looked into her eyes, and immediately we both knew that was not all she wanted me to do.

Me: So...Is that what they are calling IT nowadays?
Auntie: Sorry?

Ah she was playing coy. I started pondering, it has been a while since I got some. And she wasn't really that bad looking. Alright you know what, looks don't really matter to me anymore. Like they say, desperate people do desperate things.

Me: Alright, I will play your little game. Let's go back to your place.
Auntie : Errr..ok..thanks.

So she lead me to her apartment. She told me to head into her daughter's room while she fixed me a drink. I thought it was a bit disturbing to do it in her daughter's room but hey, whatever rocks her boat. So I went in and sat on the bed.

A couple minutes later she came in with my drink and ..switched on the PC.

Auntie: See? The damn thing doesn't boot up! Err why are you sitting on my daughter's bed?

K alright so I made a mistake. But it was an honest one, how was I supposed to know that she really wanted me to fix her daughter's computer?

Sunday, July 24, 2005

More on skin care

I can't believe people actually thought I paid 120 for a facial! Obviously I ain't that crazy to pay that kinda money for a facial, it only cost me 60, the other 60 I spent on a facial kit for men. As TY mentioned in my last entry's comment section, the problem with facials (and I am sure most guys out there will agree) is that you are prone to pimple breakouts after you gone for one. This used to frustrate me always, but now thanks to the skin kit it isn't a problem anymore.

Basically the skin kit consists of a cleanser, facial scrub, shaving gel, moisturizer and a medicated clearing gel. I especially love the clearing gel, you put it on at night before you sleep and it regulates oil production from your face to prevent those nasty pimple breakouts. It has worked wonders for me so I highly recommend it. And if you get it within the end of this month you get these 2 really cute teddy bears for free! Aren't they like the cutest bears you ever seen?

Went to Brewerkz with a male friend last Friday on a man date (because we were both kinda in a dating slump). It was going pretty well, until this Indian waiter started trying to chat us up. You know the type - the typical Indian guy who's charming, cocky, talks a lot of crap and probably thinks he's god's gift to women. He kept trying to engage us in small talk, asking us whether we will going clubbing after dinner, where we were working etc.

It got pretty annoying after a while, I was wondering why the hell would he wanna chat up two guys. I mean if he was a cute waitress chick then I wouldn't have mind. But then again I wasn't too surprised, been having the worst luck with women recently, it's been quite distressing. Yes I am looking for sympathy here. And to make the evening worse, I asked my friend if he saw any difference in my complexion and he said no, that totally killed my mood that night. But then again it was pretty dark in the restaurant.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

I love facials

Last 2 days of work were sucky. Which was why I went for a nice relaxing facial after work yesterday. Hey I deserve to be pampered once in a while alright; besides the pores on my face got pretty clogged up after being exposed to the polluted air in Indonesia last week.

And I am glad I went for it, it was a really relaxing two hours, the girl who attended to me was pretty good with her hands. In fact she was so good that I almost dozed off while she massaged my face. Now my face feels really clean and oil-free, and everyone who saw me today was telling me how amazing I look and how my face had this really radiant glow. Yup that was definitely 120 dollars well-spent.

Can't wait to go back.

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Back to Singapore

Ha it's kinda cute, I walked to the lounge to use the computer when I noticed something different. The sign. It said 15,000 Rp for an hour; it used to say 15,000 for unlimited usage. I am wondering if it had anything to do with me using the PC for 4 hours yesterday (hey it was raining outside alright). Sigh no more downloading porn anymore. Those cheapskate bastards.

I will be on my flight back home tomorrow morning. I say this with a heavy heart. Yes I do not wanna leave this island paradise that I wish I could call home. The people here have accepted me with open arms as one of their own. They have helped me when I needed help (for a token sum). Now I know how it feels to let go of something you love with all your heart. I love you Indonesia. And I will be back someday.

I am a little apprehensive about going back though. What if it had changed during my time away? What if the people I know are no longer there? K that's a bit far-fetched but what if THEY had changed and I no longer recognize them? Or maybe I was the one who had changed, what if I had become a different person from the one my parents knew before I left? Would they still be willing to accept me back?

I guess I will know the answer tomorrow. Wish me luck.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Day 5 in Jogja

Despite my mostly enjoyable stay at the Hotel Inna Garuda I have one really huge complaint when it comes to security and it pissed me off pretty badly.

I have administrator privileges on this computer that I am typing on right. Yes, ADMINISTRATOR privileges, can you believe that? Neither could I at first, so you can imagine how shocked I was when I realized it. It basically means I can trash the whole computer and no one would be able to stop me. Or even worse, I could write a virus and screw the whole machine up.

Proper IT practice dictates that a guest account should be created for normal users so that they will not be able to compromise the system, accidentally or otherwise. It's just amazing how these people can let something like this happen. I tried telling the hotel staff about their huge security breach but they just looked back at me with blank stares, they were like blind sheep unable to see the huge chasm in front of them despite my rantings.

So I did what little I could. I updated their virus scan files. Also installed Java on the computer. All this on a slow as hell connection mind you. Fine I installed Java because I needed a way to check my bank account online but seriously it's insane not to have Java on any machine, my colleagues would probably laugh like crazy if they heard about this. I was gonna install other stuff like Ad-aware and update their Internet Explorer but I decided I had already done enough, hell they should be paying me for this.

But other than this huge security flaw the hotel is pretty reasonable, so don't let my experience dissuade you from staying here.

Oh went to this club called Hugo yesterday night, but didn't have a great time. You know, there are times when I wish I was a girl. This was one of them. It was ladies night and they were handing out free tequila shots to women all night around, and despite my attempts at trying to convince the bartender that I was a really good looking butch he didn't buy it. Damn my manly looks. And drinks here are really expensive, we are talking ten bucks a glass. I had a double shot of bourbon and it cost me 20 dollars.

Yup so didn't have as much fun as I could have if I got a little wasted. The thing about me is I dance like a prick if I ain't high. Fine I dance like a prick as well when I am high but at least I would be too wasted to care.

Alrighty then , hope you people are having fun working while I am holidaying here. Over and out. Going shopping for underwear now, I realized I only brought 4 pairs.

Here's the stallion, reporting from Jogja.
That's in Indonesia, from Singapore it ain't that far.
It was ladies night at Hugo, they were handing out free tequilas.
I stood there all sober while ladies all around me got high real fast.
Drinks were pretty ex, it was 10 dollars a pop
I am kinda broke right now, otherwise I would have kept on drinking, I wouldn't stop.

Fine that was a sucky rhyme but I ain't got time to think of a nice one. Later.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Passion

One thing that very few people know about me is my artistic ability. Yes, yours truly used to dabble in the fine arts of drawing and painting when I was younger. One of my favorite pastimes was to freeze frame porn clips and then draw out the scene on my little sketch pad. I did wanna draw using a live subject but most of the girl friends I asked reacted in disgust, some even went to the extent of asking their boyfriends to make sure I never bothered them again.

It's just so hard being an artist in Singapore, people here are so close minded when it comes to nudity . The human body has always intrigued me with its natural beauty, its curves and its arches, I only wanted to show that to other people. But after numerous beatings/spitting from women and their boyfriends, my passion for it totally faded.

Until I saw this post by milktea asking for artwork from her readers. Immediately I felt something deep inside of me, a spark being rekindled from the ashes of my passion for art. I decided I would draw once again.

So I went to Artpad and started working on my masterpiece. Five hours later, it was complete. I was proud of it, despite the years of inactivity it was pretty obvious I had not lost my touch. I sent it to her, not expecting anything in return - it was my gift to her, for reminding me of the joys I had missed from painting.

SO you can imagine my surprise when it appeared as one of her favorites. You can click the link and see the drawing if you want to. I had not expected it as I figured she would probably not appreciate my masterpiece due to her lack of artistic knowledge but I was pleasantly proven wrong. Well her knowledge of art isn't THAT amazing to be honest, considering she chose someone else's drawing over mine as her favorite, but really it doesn't matter because I never expected anything in return in the first place.

So thank you Milktea. And Happy Birthday.

Monday, July 11, 2005

In Jogyakarta

Sawadika ! This is the Stallion reporting you live from the Inna Garuda hotel in Jogyakarta (or Jogja) with an ancient Pentium III computer running Windows 98. I was gonna plug in my camera and upload pictures for ya but it ain't possible with Windows 98.

Firstly, it was a pretty traumatic flight. I had to take a connecting flight in Jakarta from Singapore, but the problem was when I reached Jakarta it was 7:30, my flight to Jogja as at 8. I had to re-check in with my luggage and by the time I got my luggage it was like 7:50. By that time they were already calling for all remaining passengers so I started to panic and ran around looking for the departure hall, but I couldn't find it.

So there I was, all alone and scared in Jakarta and about to miss my flight; it was all too much for me and I began to realise that my eyes were starting to water. But thanks to God's grace I was saved, this nice Indonesian woman who saw me sobbing at one corner, and she took me to the departure hall. I was thinking about how nice she was to help me till she asked me for money. Gave her Singapore 2 dollars and rushed in. The rest I will not go into detail here, but think of Amazing Race and how they run around in the airport and you get the general picture. I was so late they didn't even allow me to check in my huge ass luggage, I had to bring it to the plane. But yeah I finally managed to catch it.

But that was the only glitch, been having a great time so far. Yesterday visited the world's biggest Buddhist temple, the one I talked about in my previous post. It's pretty amazing. The entire temple is made up of volcanic bricks stacked up against each other, without any cement or anything to hold them together. Which means you can actually push the bricks and it will move. And the amazing thing is the volcano is like 3 or 4 kilometers away so you can imagine the effort needed to move the rocks for such a huge temple.

Another amazing thing is the buddha statues. The lower part of the temple are full of buddha statues. As you go higher up , they are enclosed in a dome with little openings in them. Finally when you reach up to the top, there is a single huge Buddha statue that is completely enclosed, as you can't even see it. The significance, according to a friend of mine, is that they represent different stages of enlightenment. In the lower parts of the temple Buddha is susceptible to outside influences. In the mid-levels he is more enlightened and therefore less susceptible to outside influences (represented by the dome). Finally when he reaches enlightened he is completely blocked from any external forces. Pretty cool ain't it. Will upload pictures as soon as I find a terminal with Windows XP.

Oh guess who is staying at the same hotel as me. Yes it's Nethia. As soon as she saw me she recoiled in horror and said something about me "invading her space". Like hello, there is such a thing called coincidence. Apparently she's there on a school trip, like how was I supposed to know about that? It's not as if I would call the university she's from and enquire about the flight dates and the hotels that she would be staying at. She complained to the hotel staff , but the most they could do was to put me on a different level.

Anyway that's about it from me. I miss you all (ya right). Will probably blog in another couple of days. Right now I am heading off to the red light district flea market and see if I can get cheap stuff.

Friday, July 08, 2005

Holiday! Celebrate!

Yes one more day, and I will be in Yogyakarta. Mom is understandably apprehensive about me travelling alone. She wanted to invite her church friends over and perform a farwell mass to pray for my safety, but I managed to talk her out of it, thank God. But she did make me swear at our family altar not to go near young boys or sleazy women while I am there. Sigh, you make one mistake (fine two) in the past and they will never let you forget it. And sleazy is such a general word isn't it? What might seem sleazy to her might not be sleazy to me.

Anyway it's not only about women, I am also really looking forward to going to see Borobudur, which is apparently the largest Buddhist temple in the world. There are also a lot of other cultural and historical places of interest that I am going to check out, as well as a go karting place if it's cheap enough.


K on to other news.

Read a very interesting article on Live 8 which I really have to agree with. Did that concert really help anyone besides those who performed (by giving them a whole lot of free publicity) ?

Oh and if you ever heard the album Frances the Mute by prog band Mars Volta, read this extremely funny review. Hey I love them to death, but they did go a little overboard on that album, even for that genre.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Special Price, My Brown Ass

Went to Queensway Shopping Centre with the sis yesterday to shop for new clothes. I been in real need of a change of wardrobe due to the fact that my bulging stomach muscle has rendered most of my clothing useless.

Got myself 3 pairs of jeans and 3 shirts, all in all it was a good shopping experience, I was able to find clothes my size rather easily yesterday, which is one of the biggest problems I usually face that make me hate shopping. But had this pretty funny encounter at one the shops. I was going to buy on buying this funky polo T-shirt and this shiny ah-beng jeans (for Mambo nights at Zouk), but I was also very keen on this other pair of jeans that really accentuated my long legs and showed off my perky bum. But buying all of them would set me back $130 so I tried to get her to bring down the price.

Sis: Can give cheaper, our budget is only around 100. How about 115.
Saleslady: K...I give you special price. But you cannot tell anyone alright. *Starts pressing on her calculator furiously* I can give you a dollar off both jeans. So I give you everything for.....128 dollars!

WTF , she gives a two freaking dollars discount "specially for me" and she wants me to keep it a secret? Ya I am sure if I tell people about it they would all rush down and demand her generous two dollar discount. Miserly patronizing bitch. I was getting a bit irritated by this time so ....

Me: It's ok I will just get the beng jeans and the polo T then.
Saleslady: Oh..then the other one?
Me: (Super cool demeanor) Can't afford it. It's alright, wasn't that keen on it anyway.
Saleslady: Wait wait...let me talk to my boss first.

Boss comes over and tells me that he will give me that price, eventhough it is the first time he has ever given such a big discount. Ya RIGHT, and I have a small dick. But he warns me not to tell people about it, or there will be grave consequences, like I will never be offered two dollar discounts ever again.

So after all the drama, I got my 2 jeans and funky polo T for 115 dollars.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Paul Gilbert

K I don't normally do this but it's for a really good friend so just check out the following event.

A 2 day non-stop party in the heart of Singapore, Suntec City Convention Hall! Get into the groove and set the mood for the biggest dance party on the 15 & 16 July 2005 with the RESIDENT DJs from MINISTRY OF SOUND, LONDON.

Also catch one of the best guitarists in the world, PAUL GILBERT (Mr. Big, Racer X) and his band on his Space Ship One World Tour Live in Singapore on 16 July 2005.
*Special Lunch Date Package with Paul Gilbert on 17 July 2005 also available. Please contact Swee Lee Music Company or Loud Entertainments for purchase details!

This is one party you definitely wouldn't want to miss! Brought to you for the first time in Singapore. Mark down your
diary and JOIN US at Vibes ClubFest 05! See You there!

TICKETS ON SALE NOW AT ALL SISTIC OUTLETS ISLANDWIDE! CALL SISTIC AT TEL: 6348 5555 or log on to www.sistic.com.sg for your ticket purchases!


Click on the following link for online ticket purchases: Buy tickets

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Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Can't wait till Saturday

Yes I'm off for a well-deserved holiday in Indonesia, will be going to Jogyakarta for a week. Work has been really sucky for a while now, and I been spending the whole week compiling applications for Solaris 10 x86, which is much less fun than it sounds.

But before I go to Indonesia I just wanna say thanks to everyone who supported me during the really tough period I went through a week ago. Yes some mean anonymous guy hurt my feelings by telling me that he didn't find me funny, that I was " adolescent, derivative" and didn't have a "good turn of phrase".

It really affected me in a bad manner, more than I would care to admit. The truth is I actually have pretty low self-esteem, and there are few things about myself that I am proud of - there's my 50 inch dick, my boyish good looks and my sense of humor ...and that's about it. So it upsets me when someone demeans one of those qualities. It got to a point where I even contemplated stopping this blog.

But with the support of my friends, family and readers I managed to overcome this ordeal and I am stronger for it. So I just wanna thank you people out there for your support, you gave me strength with your kind words and encouragement, even if I don't know most of you in person. And if there is anything I can do to help you in return just say the word (priority given to hot chicks).

God bless you all.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Damm you army

I had been notified 6 months earlier that I would be undergoing 1 week of reservist army training for the week of July 4th so I have been training hard to prepare for it. Really hard. Been watching movies like Band of Brothers, Saving Private Ryan, Army Girls Gone Wild and whatever army movie I could find to psyche myself up. I also been leopard-crawling and marching around my house, all so that I would be ready when the training starts.

But yesterday all my efforts came to naught. A lady from my unit's HQ department called me to inform me that I don't have to attend the reservist training because I had to go for another pre-requisite course first. I asked her why she waited till 2 days before the training to inform me. She started laughing hysterically for the longest time, and then said "Don't you know how the army works, fool? Do you even need to ask?"

So that's that. I have to wait till November to go for that course. Kinda disappointed because I was really looking forward to it, to taking orders from people on an ego trip, to eating crappy canteen food, to sleeping with 20 other men in the same room, to wearing my old uniform which looks more like a tank top thanks to my bigger ...err..muscles.

Damn you army.

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Batman

Went to watch Batman with 2 gal friends a couple weeks ago, I was kinda hoping they would get frightened by the Dark Knight and grab on to me during the movie but no such luck. I throughly enjoyed the movie, it was the best Batman movie since the first one and miles ahead of the crap that was Batman and Robin. I was looking forward to discussing the movie with my 2 gal friends during dinner.

Instead the first thing they "discussed" as soon as we left the cinema was how huge Christian Bale's biceps were during the bedroom scene and how hot he looked while doing his push-ups. I stared at them disapprovingly. Fine, so his biceps were impressively huge, and yes I did find myself wishing I was lying below him while he did his push-ups (but only for a fleeting moment), but that's not the main point of the movie!

I wanted to discuss the dark, serious tone of the movie as compared to the cartoony feel of the last two. Or whether Michael Keaton was better than Bale in the batsuit. But yeah instead we ended up discussing his biceps in great detail and how cute he was. Fun.

Oh Blogger now supports uploading of images directly. Gotta try it out soon.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

No this ain't about the movie. This is about the book. Friends have been telling me incessantly that it's the funniest book ever written and I HAVE to read it, so I finally got myself a copy from Borders to see what the fuss was all about.

And lo and behold it did turn out to be the funniest book ever written. I could barely turn a page without laughing out loud. I wished I had read it sooner. These are all the things I wish I could say. But unfortunately the reality is it was as funny as the pimple on my ass.

I just don't get it. I consider myself a fairly funny guy (I'm being very humble here) but the humor presented in this book escapes me. Fine I did laugh like once, can't remember which part it was though. I was probably laughing because of how lame it was. I even tried re-reading it, I figured maybe I was too tired the first time so I couldn't give it my all or something, (I have the same problem with women) but it didn't work.

- Start of philosophical mode -
I guess humor is subjective. What someone finds funny might turn off another. There are those who think I am god's gift to comedy and worship the ground I walk on(thank you mom), but then there are also others who can't stand me with some even going to the extent of spitting vegetables at me during dinner. I guess the lesson here is you can never please everyone, you just gotta be true to yourself and do what you believe in.
- End of philosophical mode -

My best pick up lines revealed!

Just thought I would share this with you people. I know a lot of people wonder just how the stallion gets his women. Well wonder no more, for now you can too, with these tried and tested lines from yours truly.

1. I won't stop bugging you until I get the address of your home page.
2. Let's convert our potential energy to kinetic energy.
3. Wanna come back to my office and see my dual CPU, 2 GB RAM servers?
4. How about you and I go back to my place and form a covalent bond?
5. You're sweeter than glucose.
6. We're as compatible as two similar Power Macintoshes.
7. Wanna see how much faster programs run on my Opteron servers compared to Pentiums?
8. Your body has the nicest arc length I've ever seen.
9. You're hotter than a bunsen burner set to full power!
10. My love for you is like a concave up function because it is always
increasing.

I lost count of the number of women I snagged with those lines. Sigh, sometimes I really miss those playboy days. But I have left my wild past behind me, so you guys go ahead and use them, they are all yours.

Disclamer : I actually got the pick-up lines from an email. Except for no. 3 and 7, those are mine. Just in case someone accuses me of passing it off as my own.