Thursday, September 30, 2004

To Unperfect

Remove "bgcolor=navyblue" from your html code and your page will be viewable with netscape/mozilla/firefox. Yep it was bugging me so I went through the code and found out the problem.

p.s. You should really leave a point of contact on your blog.

Me and my big mouth

I got a call yesterday from my cousin whom I met at a party a couple months back. We haven't seen each other in years before that party.

Her: Hey I am having a birthday party on Friday evening. You free to come?
Me: Sure I would love to. By the way anything you want me to buy for your birthday. I prefer to get people things that they want rather than getting something they will just chuck away in the closet.
Her : Hmmm ok....Well ,,,,there's this thing...nah nevermind.
Me: Oh what is it? Tell me!
Her : Well I been wanting an MP3 player...
Me : Oh....ok....hmmm....
Her : Nah it's ok forget it.
Me : I will pretend as if I never heard it. See ya on Friday alright!

Think I will just get her one of those gift sets from Bodyshop.
Hey I don't even have an mp3 player myself alright!

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Internet breeds weirdness

My blogging slump continues, so for the time being I am gonna piggyback on topics on other websites.

First we have erotic robot fan fiction. Yes if you ever fantasized about screwing Optimus Prime or being screwed by him/it then this is the place for ya. Have to really thank them for destroying all memories of wonderment and awe I had as a kid when I watched Transformers. So if you wanna hang on to those memories you might not wanna visit the site.

Second are gay men who like to role play as babies. The website features men in diapers and milk bottles. I pity those families who live in the same neighbourhoods as those men, if it was me I would probably move out right away. And here I was feeling so much shame about my panty wearing fetish, which is now public knowledge thanks to Charlene. But hey if Joey from Friends likes to wear them it can't be that bad can it. I don't think you will find an adult sitcom character wearing a diaper anytime soon.

Both links are taken from somethingawful.

Friday, September 24, 2004

Stallion system of blogrolling

Today is a sad day for the Stallion. I just found out that my blog has been taken off someone's blogroll. It's a sucky feeling when you realize that your blog no longer brings the same level of joy and laughter to someone, so much so they decide to take it off. It's a feeling that is even suckier than cleaning some other guy's piss off the toilet seat I tell ya. At first I thought there was something wrong with the person's blogroll, that was why it didn't display my link. But then I realized the truth, it was actually done on purpose. Hey they didn't call me "sharp-brained stallion" in school for nothing alright, I always noticed stuff that were oblivious to everyone else. Ok only this weird gal in school called me that but it still counts.

Not sure if anyone notices but I shift the links in my blogroll around once a month. I think my system is vastly superior to the usual sort by alphabet system that most people use so I am gonna share it with ya. This is how it goes, every month I allocate points to everyone based on certain completely unbias criteria. I then tally up the points and sort it from the highest to lowest. I then get my mom to verify the results and to ensure that there is no foul play before I update my blogroll. The criteria is as follows :

-2000 points for personal attacks to my character like comparing me to a crappy book.
-1000 points for not updating in a month (cumulative with the weekly -500 point penalty below)
-500 points for not updating in a week
-500 points for forgetting or not wishing me on my birthday.
-500 points for mentioning me on your blog in a negative context.
+500 points for making me smile with a entry.
+500 points for telling me an interesting fact that I didn't know in an entry.
+500 points for writing an entry that I can totally relate to.
+500 points for mentioning me in a good context .
+1000 points for making me laugh with an entry.
+1000 points for adopting the Stallion system for blogrolling for your own blog.
+1000 points if my blog in on the top of your blogroll.
+5000 points for sending me a naked picture of yourself
-10000 points if the above naked picture of yourself has a penis in it.

There you have it. Please feel free to use the system for your own blog, but please do give credit where it is due, that's all I ask.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Define Irony?

When a gal smses me asking me to grow up, and then follows it up with creative insults about my character. My pick of the lot is the one where she compares me to a book whose cover and contents are crap, just like me. Ouch.

Piss Pisses Me Off

I went to the company loo this morning (had a little too much chilli the night before) and much to my chagrin the only toilet cubicle left had a toilet seat that was splattered with piss. I don't get it. How does a guy do it. It can't be possible if the idiot was sitting on the seat, so the only way is he was standing up and pissing without lifting up the seat. You would think someone who works at a MNC would actually possess basic hygiene skills but you would be dead wrong. This has happened to me on more than one occasion

Anyway it was really urgent so I had no choice but to wipe the piss myself. Yup there is no better way to start your day then to wipe some other guy's piss off the toilet seat I tell ya.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Curse of the Stallion

It's too coincidental to be a ..err...coincidence. For the third year running I get crap happening to me around my birthday. Crap that I am pretty sure I don't deserve but it still happens nonetheless. What's up with that!?

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Theory of Babies

Regarding the earlier post a couple of days ago, Kore had a rather interesting theory. She mentioned that human babies are not guided by instinct like other animal babies. And the reason for this is because of our intelligence and ability to think rationally overrides our instincts. This could be why they are much more helpless compared to other babies in the animal kingdom. Makes a lot of sense to me.

Well my theory (and a more plausible one) is that babies are just spoilt brats. Hell when I was a baby I had to crawl to the provision shop to buy milk and diapers for myself. Well at least that's what my mom told me, I can't really remember doing it. Kids really have it good nowdays.

Blogger Block

Yes having a bad case of it again. So I am going to bitch. About this little thing called Short Messaging Service or SMS. I find it so annoying at times. It's definitely useful, but it has come to a point where SMS has been so widely used that it is also being used for situations where it isn't appropriate. I am talking about situations that require a more personal touch, where maybe the person should pick up the damm phone and call the other party rather than just sending an SMS. There have been cases of bosses firing their staff or husbands divorcing their wives using SMS. Probably because the parties in question had no balls to do it in person or over the phone. But of course there are also less extreme examples. Such situations include informing the other party that you would not be able to make it for a meeting. Or wishing the other person on their birthday.I can't help but get irritated when it happens to me. Or am I just being petty?

Speaking of birthdays I had mine couple days ago. Like every year I spent it at home with my 2 dogs. I swear they knew (don't ask me how) that it was my birthday, they gave me this look that's just a little different from the usual look of awe they give me. I can't really describe it but if I really had to, it would be a "Why are you at home with us on your birthday you poor loser" kind of look. Of course like every year I would buy gifts for them that I think they would give to me if they had opposable thumbs. Thanks for the flea collar and shampoo you guys, I love ya to death!

Ok I was gonna stop here but I know some people who read this will really think I did the above. Yes you will be surprised. I actually had a really great birthday, had dinner with a really close friend who got me the most amazing present, probably the best one I ever had. I'm already starting to rack my brains on how I am gonna match this for her birthday. Maybe I can do a striptease or something think she might like that. Oh and thanks to those who called me to wish me as well. You guys are the best. To the rest I shall not friend you for one month starting today.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Long time no update

Yes I been gone a week. Well nothing much to update here except had quite an interesting phone conversation with someone I gotta know recently, we talked on the phone for about 4 hours till 4 am in the morning. Haven't done that in a long time. Not sure if there is anything here, just gotta wait and see.

Spent the weekend at my sister's place, just hanged out with her and my cousin. Had to fake some interest in her kid while I was there. You know stuff like playing with her hair and making baby talk. Arrgh. Yes I am an evil uncle but I am just not fond of kids alright, that's just me.

I was thinking the other day and its kinda surprising how we are the most intelligent beings on earth but when it comes to fending for itself human babies are probably the worst at it in the animal kingdom. Most animals can at least move around after they are born, babies on the other hand just lie on their backs the whole day. You would think we would be more self-reliant from birth considering our intelligence.

Monday, September 06, 2004

25 going on to be whipped

I realised something today - the Stallion is becoming a pussy, pardon my french. You know what were the last 2 movies I went to see? Stepford Wives and 13 going on 30. 2 horrible chick flicks that I would have never seen a couple years back even if I had a gun to my head. So why did I go then? I will tell you why! It's because the gals I went with both times wanted to see those movies and I just couldn't say no. Arggh. What happened to the guy that made women quiver in fear with his menacing yet totally sexy and mysterious stare?

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Fired for Blogging

Read this off a comment on mrbrown. A gal who was working on Friendster was fired about blogging about her work. I am guessing the Friendster folks didn't like the part about "unacceptably poky site performance". It's kinda scary ain't it, cases like this seems to be happening more often.

My company recently embraced blogging and even set up a company website to allow people to host their blogs on it. But nah I prefer to keep work and personal stuff separate. I did wanna start a blog to record my daily work activities but never got around to it. Maybe I should start soon.

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Womad Picture

Oh I totally forgot I had this. Here is a picture of the hip hop group at WOMAD!  Posted by Hello

Happy Teacher's Day!

Yeah I totally forgot that today is happy teacher's day. I still remember my teachers, well especially that really hot physics teacher in Junior College with the really nice rack. And I didn't even take Physics.

But I do admire them. The way they patiently educate the spoilt brats that we have nowadays. Seriously if I was a teacher I would have probably strangled the life out of one of them by now. It's just unbelievable how snobbish and full of themselves they are, they don't even give an ounce of respect to their teachers sometimes. And all thanks to the overpampering parents who give them everything they want. I mean for god's sake I have seen primary school kids having better handphones than me. The world has gone crazy I tell ya.

Sigh I miss the days when teachers disciplined their students through physical means. Those were the good old days. If you went out of line they would humiliate you in front of the others and chances are you will not do it again out of sheer embarrassment.

And finally teachers are just hot. The whole disciplining and authoritative thing is more than a tad sexy. Lost count of the number of times I dreamt in college that I told the hot Physics teacher that I been a bad bad boy and that I should be punished. With a whip. Hmm maybe I should pay her a visit sometimes soon.

So once again happy teacher's day to all you teachers out there!


And it goes on and on...

Yes the most popular and infamous blog in Singapore continues to be discussed and criticised incessantly by other local bloggers. Most of whom just can't stand the fact that her blog is getting more hits a day than they get in a month. No, I am not one of them how dare you imply that!

Anyway latest post is courtesy of Mr. Brown. Man bloggers are a creative bunch I tell ya, "William Hung of blogging" is one hell of an insult. But I do feel for her sometimes, it cannot be easy getting put down and criticised as often as she does, just for voicing her opinion. But then again her blogging style is sometimes really confrontational and provoking. Hell even I have poked fun of the blog in the past I have to admit, albeit in a pretty subtle way. Hmm it was subtle right?

Speaking of blogging, a friend I had dinner with yesterday was telling me I shouldn't blog about some of the stuff that I do as it puts me in a bad light. His reasoning was that he knows me so he knows that some of the stuff ain't true, but others who don't know me that well might think otherwise. And he's not the first friend to say that. I understand his concerns, and yes people have in the past have made assumptions about me based on the stuff I blog about as well. Like chicks think I'm like this big pervert and desperado. Hello I am not THAT desperate alright. But yeah if I start censoring my writings to make sure it doesn't happen then it would be pointless to go on. But yeah remember kids, don't assume you know what a person is like just by reading his/her blog. For all you know I could be a 70 year old horny granpa with multiple personalities.

Oh and for someone who works in IT I should have been more careful. Damm that Autocomplete feature!!!