Thursday, March 25, 2004

Ok part 2 of my transition to serious blogging. 'Serious' meaning superior to most other blog writers out there who talk about mundane things like how hip their new shoes are or how they are god's gift to women, how they got no social life and spent the whole weekend at home jerking off to porn or how they dont know what to do with their lives.

I have actually said this to many women but it's amazing how surprised they get when I tell them the truth. Most refuse to believe it or are totally skeptical, they would rather take the blue pill and remain in their make believe world. What is it I say that invokes this reaction ? Simple. Just one statement. "All men are perverts".

Yes I am sure most of the gals who read my blog will start thinking "hey that's not true, i know this guy who is totally decent and non-pervertic. BTW this Indian Stallion guy seems to be a totally hunk and I definitely wanna take him for a ride.". Well sorry but you are half wrong; that guy is a perv. I will explain why.

But first I will say it again; every guy is a perv. We all think perverted thoughts at least 90 percent of the time. We fantasise about every gal that we meet, ok almost every gal. If you are half-decent looking (well its actually more of if a guy considers you half decent) then chances are all your straight guy friends have fantasised about you, at least once, probably more. We have also thought of bizarre perverted behavior at least some point in our life. But let me re-assure you, thinking and acting them out are two totally different things. You ain't gonna see me wearing a cowboy outfit and spanking a gal wearing a cow costume anytime soon, but that doesn't mean I haven't thought of it alright. Besides cow costumes are pretty hard to find in Singapore.

There are basically three major type of perverts in existence: the silent perv, the normal perv, and the criminal perv.
The silent perv is the guy who everyone thinks is totally decent and could be the next head of the church. Basically the silent perv thinks perverted thoughts 80 percent of the time but hides his thoughts from everyone else ;because he either feels guilty about them or doesn't wanna let people think any less of him. Most guys are silent pervs.

The non-silent perv is the guy who thinks perverted thoughts as well as expresses them freely to people. This is me now. We are usually the people with the hippest shoes, don't ask me why. And we usually scare women away with our sexual frankness...sigh ... it has happened one too many times to me....DAMM WOMEN!!! WHY CAN'T THEY HANDLE THE TRUTH??? I HATE THEM!!!!!.....but anyway back to my point, yeah we are not that common and usually isolated and lonely and single.

Finally, you have the criminal perv. The criminal perv is the guy who actually acts out his perversions. We are talking sex offenders and the like. Ok nothing more about them, less said the better.

So there you have it. I hope this post does enlighten women-kind to the mystery that is man. I mean I do know a lot of you see my blog as source of moral compass for your own lives (which I am very honoured to be by the way) so I am just trying my best to fulfill that role. But a little money would help a long way to me doing that. I'm a couple hundred dollars short of a new Playstation 2 fyi.

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