Tuesday, December 30, 2003

Really crappy day today. Few things feel worse than the feeling that you are being pitied. Even if that was probably not the person's intention. And I feel like I am in real danger of losing something that I really treasure. Hope it's just me over-reacting. But I just can't help feeling that I do not deserve all this. But hey who said life is fair right.

I was blog-surfing a couple hours ago and I stumbled into 1 which mentioned that she found my blog humorous and insightful. It really made my (crappy) day. Yeah ok so its a little strange to be glad about being flattered by someone whom I never met or talked to , but with the day I had it was really what I needed. At least there are still people who think I'm not all that bad. Now I just have to make sure I never meet her so that she will never think otherwise.

I was supposed to go drinking with my bro-in-law and his friends tommorow night , but I changed my mind. They are nice people and all but I can't really click with them. So will probably be staying at home alone. Not exactly the way I wanted to start my new year but not much choice there.

Sunday, December 28, 2003

OK so it (XMAS) wasn't as bad as I expected. Gotta ogle at some of my really hot cousins (not blood related ok) , and of cos as is customary every year everyone was raving about my mom's ayam masak merah. But I was pretty quiet the whole day, just not very comfortable around people I don't know well, unlike my sis who is like super sociable. But hope my sis learns how to cook it soon, cos my mom isn't getting any younger and its a really tiring dish to prepare. But I don't know if it is me but kids nowdays seem so much older than they look. I was kinda checking out my uncle's daughter who I thought was at least 17-18, turned out that she was only 14.

Went to a pub in Changi on Saturday with a couple of friends and hanged out for a bit. It was really nice to hang out with them for a while and talk cock, and one of them bought me the Kill Bill sountrack for Xmas. Thanks babe !

Hanged out with my sis at her place yesterday. Been hanging out with her since Xmas eve, and its good cos nowdays its really hard for us to spend any time together, and her living so far away doesn't really help either. But think she really liked my gift, that was cool.

Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Ok think it's time to look back at the past year.

Friendship

Probably the most important thing I learned the past year is who my friends are, or rather who isn't. I have always been quick to call people I like my friends, probably because I don't have many to begin with. But events that happened the past year made me really question the meaning of friendship. And right now I have to admit I probably have like only 5 people I would consider real friends right now. Ok ok 3 if I dun count my 2 dogs. But I am not on good terms with one of my dogs now , damm asshole peed in my room so I am giving him the silent treatment until he apologizes.

My Lack of Social Skills

Yup ok I known for a while I was socially inept but only in the past year did I realise that my social skills were only slightly better than a horny spastic monkey. But man this was a really hard lesson for me to learn. ...sniff

Career Goals

I was always sure about what I wanted to work as when I graduated, but now I have no freaking idea. And it's kinda scary cos I'm already 25.

Women

K I think I need to stop thinking about women who are way way out of my league. So goodbye Uma Thurman, and hello kopi tiam auntie! Yes she's really not that bad looking, and there's this undeniable sexual tension everytime she hands me my kopi-o in the morning. Think it's time for me to explore that.

Ok so all in all I would give this year a 4 out of 10. It was mostly bad, but there were some good things that came out of it. Met a few really wonderful people that I am really glad to have the pleasure of knowing....err what else.....well i think my dick grew like a cm longer thanks to all that time at home watching porn. Oh and of cos the ability to spend relatively carefreely was also quite nice to have.

Goals for next year

1. Get laid.
2. Lose weight.
3. Get laid after losing weight.
4. Expand my social circle.
5. Watch less porn.

Tuesday, December 23, 2003

Really looking forward to Xmas day. Cos every year its the same exciting thing. My relatives whom I never see for the past year come down to eat our food and make boring small talk while pretending to be interested about what we been up to. I seriously do not understand the point of doing it year after year but apparently we are obliged to invite them because they invited us for Deepavali or Hari Raya so it would be rude of us not to invite them. Well I have a brilliant idea, how about we screw politeness and only invite people who we really want to invite? First of all it would save us a hell lot of money and time in terms of food preparation and entertainment. Oh and let me not even get to the xmas decorations my dad puts up year after year. I think he could save a lot of effort by leaving them all year round because it never changes.
Yup really looking forward to Xmas day.
Just remembered I forgot someone else for my XMAS present list. Damm this is hard. Still not sure what to buy for 3 people. Will be doing last minute gift shopping today and tommorow.

BTW things I would really love to have for XMAS:

1. Take a Look in the Mirror by Korn
2. Tenacious D by Tenacious D
3. Any book on Led Zeppelin
4. Play by Moby

I can't be any more subtle.

A friend asked me to go clubbing with him and his friends on Xmas Eve. Quite hesitant cos I am not really the clubbing type, let's just say that some people are just not born to dance. But the alternative is to stay at home and stare at my xmas tree with my 2 dogs, which i been doing every year. Damm I just hate dilemmas like this.
Went shopping for clothes on Sunday with a friend. I really HATE shopping. Mainly because I can never get clothes that fit me. I saw a couple of shirts that I liked but when I tried them on they dun fit and thats the largest size. Is it my fault that I have a bigger stomach bone compared to most people !? Anyway I ended up getting 2 shirts thats it. Gotta get my pants and shoes another day.

Also got a couple of xmas presents from Borders, but just realised I totally forgot to buy a present for one person. I have to go down to Borders on wednesday again.

Just finished watching "As Good as It Gets" on Channel i , i think I watched it like 10 times so far. I am usually not into romantic comedies but this movie is really something different altogether, mainly because the 2 leads in the movie aren't your typical romantic leads, they are both pretty dsyfunctional in their own way and i think this sets it apart. And of cos there is that scene where Helen Hunt is wet to the core wearing a flimsy T-shirt.

Thursday, December 18, 2003

Had a really long dream last night. I dreamt that I had to go to some European country for work. When I reached there I went to the seaside, there was a waterfall near the shore and I started taking pictures of it. After that I was at some apartment with my boss and another colleague, and we started talking. Then it was time for us to go back to Singapore so we left the house and got ready to take the cab to the airport, but then I remembered I forgot my bag. They waited for me while i headed back, but I couldn't find the apartment that I was in, so finally they left without me to the airport. Can't remember anything after that.

Coincidentally two of my colleagues are overseas right now. Heh I think it's probably a manifestation of my desire to join them.

I read that Saddam's relatives claim he was sedated before he was taken in which was why he didnt resist when they found him in the hole. But I am wondering how is that possible, did they like throw sedatives and a syringe into the hole and asked him to inject himself ? Or filled the hole with sleeping gas before they dragged him out? Doesn't sound plausible.

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

Haven't been online much recently, been spending my time in an alternate fantasy world i.e. playing the Neverwinter Nights expansion, Shadows Of Undrentide. Playing an evil dual-wielding fighter/rogue who so far has robbed dying people, held a woman's baby for ransom after rescuing it, threatened to kill the mayor if he didn't agree to my demands, and back-stabbed (literally) allies. Damm fun when you lay traps on the ground and lead the stupid enemies to them, and then watch them walk right over the traps and dying without me even using my +1 Short Sword with 1D6 Cold Damage and +1 Keen Dagger. Yes I am an RPG geek happy?

Was on leave yesterday, was supposed to go cycling but change of plans last minute and ended up playing pool with my cousin. Still haven't started my exercise regime that I promised myself to get on. Oh well nevermind I will wait for my basketball khaki (pal) to come back from Melbourne on Xmas Eve. *procrastinates*

Was gonna post my favourite 5 albums of 2003 with a short review of each album, but well I found out that I wasn't really the reviewer type, find it very difficult to put into words what I loved about the albums. So anyway here is the list without any comments.


  1. De-loused in the Comatarium by The Mars Volta

  2. Thirteenth Step by A Perfect Circle

  3. Elephant by The White Stripes

  4. El Cielo by Dredg

  5. How the West was Won by Led Zeppelin


Have to give really high praise to Mars Volta, most groundbreaking stuff that I have heard since OK Computer. A definite must-have for any serious music fan. It is so full of emotion, inventiveness and free experimentation that it will make you realize how much all the other bands suck in comparison. Speaking of which I was watching this MTV show where the topic of the day was "your favourite band" and viewers sms-ed their view. The top 2 were Limp Bizkit and Linkin Park. Linkin Park I can at least understand why people like them (as much as I hate them), but Limp Bizkit ??? Can anyone tell me why they are so popular? What am I missing? Ok think it's time for me to get off my high (musical) horse.

Oh ya for the first time I am getting presents for people for Xmas, cos finally can afford to! And also I hope this will allow me to buy their friendship so that I can add more people to my friendster page (so far only 20 something!). You know they should have like a rating system for friendster. People with more than 100 friends should be given special rights to insult people who have less than 30 friends by telling them they have no life etc. by leaving comments on their pages. This will then spur the insulted lowlifes to get more friends so that they themselves can do the same to others once they have 100 friends. In this way everyone will end up with lots of friends (those who don't will hopefully commit suicide) and the world will be a happier place.

Overheard this at the workplace an hour ago, really cracked me up.

"It is not a lie, it is a change in direction"

Heh those ang mohs...have a really good way with words.

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Sigh you don't really know how bad you look till u see yourself in a picture. I saw a couple few days ago and damm I look more like a pregnant mare than a stallion. Damm depressing. The following morning I did push-ups in the morning, which I haven't done like forever. Not gonna disclose how many I did before I felt like fainting, but let's just saymy dog could have done more. Anyway I am going cycling tommorrow at East Coast, hopefully I lose a couple of inches by the end of it. *Hopeful*

I found out about the Asian Blog Awards through some of the blogs I regularly read. Checked some of them out and there was a few nominees who openly critised other blogs that were nominated; either attacking their content, their poor English or their design. Yeah true some of the blogs I read I didn't think were that great. But don't think its necessary to publicly denounce them cos that just seems a little arrogant, not to mention really mean. If you don't like a blog, then don't read it. It is as simple as that. Yeah some of them say it's just a joke but I can't really see that as one; a lot of people take their blogs seriously and they might take constructive criticism, being ridiculed is another matter. Having said that I did make fun of someone's blog a couple months back, cos I thought he was religious to the point of being ridiculous, but yeah it was a tad mean. So if he's reading this , sorry alright!

BTW how come my blog, with all its exceptional writing, irresistable humour and philosophical insights (which has probably changed at least 2 of my 5 readers' lives), wasn't nominated ? I guess some things in life just can't be explained. Or maybe too many people tried to nominate me at once, hence causing it not to be added to the list. Hey I am in computer science, it happens really often ok !

Wednesday, December 10, 2003

Yeah nothing to blog the last few weeks, well not really but I cannot blog about work. Oh did go to dinner with a friend at Oliadome on Monday and hanged out at Borders later, that's about it. Heh was reading Dilbert, damm that comic is really funny as hell, and can really relate to the jokes about the workplace. Thought this one was really funny.

1st colleague : I would like you to join the TTP project.
2nd colleague : What does TTP stand for ?
1st colleague : TTP stands for the "The Ttp Project"
2nd colleague : *Groans*


Haha don't you just love recursive jokes ......eh wait a minute... damm I really need to get laid.

Sunday, December 07, 2003

Went to a distant cousin's "coming of age" ceremony. For the unintiated, this is a ceremony that is perfomed for a gal when she reaches puberty and is performed by some Indian families, usually the more traditional ones. Didn't really wanna go but I had no plans anyway so I did , at least I got to catch up with my sis and a cousin who I recently got pretty close to. But the father of the gal who was undergoing the ceremony seemed a bit arrogant. My uncle was eating the fruit cake which was given as the door gift , and the guy came over and asked if he liked it and proceeded to highlight the fact that it was homemade and WAS really expensive. I was tempted to go "WOW that's really impressive" but didn't, otherwise I probably wouldn't get to bring back the cake, which I have to admit had a really nice homemade and expensive taste.

Saturday, December 06, 2003

Had a really bad day yesterday. The kind that almost makes me wanna pray to God asking him to help me out. Anyway was watching Survivor yesterday night and one of the contestants, John, won a reward challenge by getting the other contestants to believe that his grandma just died (which wasn't true), so that they will take pity on him and let him win. This week he is making promises to the others by swearing on his dead grandmother's grave. But it is really interesting how manipulative people can get, almost made me forget the sad fact that I am at home alone with nothing to do on a Friday night.

Today: 2/10